When You Vote Today...

...Capper wants you to know that bad policy is fine as long as it is done by a Democrat.

These are WI Democrats. They Think WI College Students are Dumb

This campaign piece paid for by the Wisconsin Democrat party was distributed on the University of Wisconsin Whitewater campus. It may meet a friendly audience on a campus, but if I had received it in the days when I was both a Democrat and a college student, I'd have been pretty peeved at the condescending tone of it. By the way, I'm told that this item violated campus policy in some way.

The Tone Deafness of Democrats Epitomized

Well done, Dems. In one final push towards electoral obliteration, you antagonized anyone not in Milwaukee, Waukesha, Jefferson, or Dane County.

Just days before an election that could decide the fate of a planned high-speed rail line, state and federal administrators quietly signed a deal to commit the state to spending all $810 million of the federal stimulus cash allocated to the Milwaukee-to-Madison route, transportation officials confirmed Monday.

The unannounced weekend agreement frees outgoing Democratic Gov. Jim Doyle's administration to sign contracts for much if not all of the work. That could hamstring efforts by Milwaukee County Executive Scott Walker and his fellow Republicans to kill the project and spend the money on something else if they take control of the governor's office and either or both chambers of the state Legislature and Congress on Tuesday.

You just lost any hope you had outstate, Democrats. Well done.

When you go to vote tomorrow...

...just remember that your current government is well on the way to stagflating us to prosperity!

Good Job, Ron

Going into this election, I was very, very concerned. I saw the weaknesses Democrats had, and I knew that Republicans ABSOLUTELY HAD to beat Russ Feingold this cycle. If they couldn't do it, he was likely going to own that seat until he chose to give it up. Given that, I hitched my wagon onto Dick Leinenkugel early on. Despite his shaky credentials, I had decided that it was better to elect a RINO that could be replaced later than to allow Feingold to entrench his ownership of that seat. And I didn't see anyone else who I thought could get the job done.

Ron Johnson is well on his way to getting the job done, and you can count the Jib of last February very surprised. Few people outside of his local business environment knew who the guy was, and we'd already seen that act in Tim Michels. But Johnson has capitalized on the political environment and run a solid, if not overly spectacular, campaign. I didn't think he could do it, and I was wrong. We won't know if he got the job done until 24 hours-plus from now. But I will admit, he was the best candidate to kick Feingold out on his ass.

If I were Milwaukee...

...Or Kenosha, or Racine, or Sheboygan, or Green Bay, I'd start making myself damn attractive to outsiders. As water limitations start to choke the big cities of the southwest and the southeast, areas around the Great Lakes are going to become very, very attractive to people.

Obama is Everything Leftists Wish Clinton Would Have Been

Seriously, think about it. Clinton was the first 'black' (but not black) President. Obama - actually black (at least as we identify it in the United States). Clinton wanted to open the Military to gays, but backed off in the face of public opinion. Under Obama, the courts blow away Clinton's 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell' compromise (which was silly anyway). Clinton tries for a first term signature with Hillary Care, and backs off in the face of massive unpopularity. Obama says, "You're going to get it, and you'll like it," and forces it through with massive Democrat majorities in Congress. At midterm of term one, Clinton loses majorities in congress. Obama is poised to lose even larger majorities.

Given all of this, I think we can safely say that Obama will seal the deal with an intern and not only be impeached but tossed out of office in his second term ;-).

Today's Crazy Thought

The rumor coming from Obama circles is that he may drop Biden for Hillary Clinton in 2012. That seems too easy, too clean in my mind. Conventional wisdom is that Hillary is still interested in running for president in 2016. I'll bet a dollar that the Clintons' are eying up a potential run at Obama in 2012 if his numbers continue to tank and that's why the Obama camp is floating a VP spot at this bizarre time.

NFL Prediction

If it starts to look as though the NFL will suspend Brett Favre, he will suddenly have to miss a game because of his elbow problems.

Packers' Brass Confident In Team As Is

JNN, Green Bay - The Green Bay Packers, pre-season Super Bowl darlings, have traveled the first quarter of the road to the playoffs whilst dropping bodies off on the gritty, narrow shoulder.

Ryan Grant. Morgan Burnett. Nick Barnett. All carved up in plastic bags like a truck stop lizard.

Yet given the chance to start filling in gaps like the 1996 Packers did en route to the Super Bowl, the current Packers' brass is confident in their depth.

"I was just telling the team on Monday, 'Get your heads up, boys. We just beat one of the most pathetic teams in the history of the game. By the skin of our teeth. Thanks to one future Hall of Famer stepping up and single handedly saving our asses. Be proud. Yeah, we sucked. And part of our game plan was atrocious. But we could actually be better, and that's something to take pride in," said head coach Mike McCarthy.

When asked why his team has not taken the season by the horns and not covered glaring injury holes via trade, GM Ted Thompson was adamant that this team was still the team to beat.

"I am confident in this team. We believe in the guys on this roster or they wouldn't be hear. We lose Ryan Grant? We fully believe that the Easter Bunny will step in and pick up the slack. No Nick Barnett? Ernie is a hungry and angry inside backer, especially when we run our 'Burt' defensive package, and we are completely confident that his puppet like dedication to his coaching will fill the gap. We are a little worried about Charlie Peprah at safety, though. Peprah is a damn fictional character."

The coach and GM have the full confidence of the team President, Mark Murphy.

"Huh, what, there's a season going on? Wait, I thought we started the lock out already? Ziggy Wilf told me that we were going to break those bastard players that I helped make so rich in my playing days this season. That son of a ..."

But even if their season goes to hell in a hand basket, Packer Hall of Famer and Milwaukee area sports commentator Mark Chmura sees a silver lining in this year.

"No matter what happens, that turn coat, fair weather friend turned asshole Brett Favre is going to get his comeuppance in a purple uniform."


This article was satire. Don't like it? Take it up with older twin of Jenn Sterger, Deanna Favre.

Bicycling Law Breakers

I am honestly this close to keeping the iPhone camera on at all times in Madison so I can highlight how frequently those bicyclers that look down their nose at all of us mouth breathing car drivers break common traffic laws. I know and have observed some bicyclers that do obey traffic laws. They are the minority.

A Brett Favre Thought

Remember when the Ol' Gun Slinger effectively distanced himself from his old budddy ol' buddy ol' buddy ol' pal Mark Chmura? Some of us weren't so sure that number 4 had gone pure after an early career of juvenile off field behavior. Now that his pickle is out there...er, umm, that he's in quite a pickle, he ain't looking a whole lot better than his former buddy Chewy. Maybe the Packers knew what they were talking about when the asked him to think of his legacy and accept a $20 million marketing offer with the team.

I Made A Mistake Becoming a Conservative

Why? Because apparently Libertarians are the smart ones amongst us (God knows they pat themselves on their back enough for being such) because they've positioned themselves amongst us so they can never be wrong. Let me tell you where I'm coming from here. Long story short, I had the pleasure of doing a little catching on some blogs this week. I was reading one Libertarian blogger, and I learned that he really, really disliked Scott Walker because he just wasn't a pure enough conservative so as to appeal to a good Libertarian. But later, I learned that he really disliked Scott Walker because he wasn't pragmatic enough to get good, conservative things done. Too 'hard headed,' I guess. Well, I guess here in the real world, we either get to be pure in principal or effectively pragmatic. But in Libertarian world, you can always be a correct critic of everyone because you can't be either and still a Libertarian. Or at least a Libertarian that actually wins a political seat somewhere.

It's Funny...

I find this idiot a hundred times more offensive than I find some school or team calling themselves "Indians" or "Blackhawks" or some other mundane, non-racist name.

Question

Does it make me enlightened or a homophobe because I couldn't give a rat's ass that Ken Mehlmen is gay?

Church v. Strippers

An interesting story:

The strippers, fueled by Cheetos and nicotine, are protesting a fundamentalist Christian church whose Bible-brandishing congregants have picketed the club where they work. The dancers roll up with signs carrying messages adapted from Scripture, such as "Do unto others as you would have done unto you," to counter church members who for four years have photographed license plates of patrons and asked them if their mothers and wives know their whereabouts.

There is a "He is risen. He is risen indeed" joke in here somewhere, but I'm too damn classy to make it.

Plants Scream

What will vegans do now?!

Call Me Karnak

I'd just like to point out that on June 24th I predicted the next food we'd be in attack mood mode on would be eggs.

Barber Shop Politics

I loathe talking politics in a barber shop. The second of my three life long barbers had a cartoon up in his shop that warned against it lest you find yourself with a horrific hair cut. Having said that, there is nothing I love more than listening to politics in a barber shop, and here's what I learned during my most recent hair cut:

1. Mr. Average, unaffiliated voter is sharper than I'd have given him credit for, but he still doesn't know how he'll vote on election day.

2. In Wisconsin, the accusations that Gubernatorial candidate Tom Barret has done nothing to fix MMSD despite his mayoral campaign promises has gained traction. Examples of promises with no action does not play well this election cycle.

3. People in certain parts of the state know businessman and Gubernatorial candidate Mark Neumann ... for building "crummy houses."

4. Candidates cannot run on the spirit of '94. Voters are wise to the fact that getting an elective body to agree to things like term limits is a pipe dream.

5. Obama is still poisonous politically.

Oh, and one more:

6. Much like voters are wise to the dubious spirit of '94, they are also wise to the homespun candidacy of Russ Feingold.

Deregulate the Hit By Pitch!

It never fails. Every summer, the bean ball becomes the talk of the nation. Some will argue that the league should do more to punish and prevent pitchers from hitting batters. Others will argue that pitcher has a right to the inside corner of the plate, and that they have the right to move hitters who crowd the plate off of it. Finally, there is a solution: Deregulate the Hit By Pitch!

Here's how it will work. First, Major League Baseball will ammend one of the most basic rules of the game. When a batter gets hit by a pitch, they will no longer be awarded first base. Instead, the pitch will be called a ball and the ball will remain live, meaning that runners may advance at their own will/peril if a pitch that hits a batter gets by the catcher. Pitchers may not be thrown out of a game for hitting a batter.

This is only half of the deregulation, however. After being beaned, a hitter may charge the mound without being thrown out of the game as long as he does not bring any weapons with him (ie, the bat). Teammates may not join the mano-y-mano duel, however, or they will risk being thrown out of the game and/or suspended. Strategically, however, this does not mean that a hitter can charge the mound with impunity. Leaving the batting area will result in a dead ball that will prevent runners from advancing.

Other current rules will remain in place. A hitter must make some attempt to avoid being hit, or at least not actively attempt to be hit, by a pitch. Any pitch that hits a part of the batter's body that is in the strike zone shall be called a strike and the at bat will continue.

Instead of teams and players only worrying about suspensions, the onus would now be on the individuals and their concern for their own well being. Hit Prince Fielder, and you may get beaten to a pulp with no help from teammates to get you out of it. Crowd the plate and anticipate a fastball in the ribs with no real reward. Once there are immediate and painful repercussions for the individual, the beanball wars will aleviate.