Saturday, December 11, 2010

Barbers, America's Biggest Group of Sandbaggers

I love barbers. There is no place of business that doesn't serve alcohol where you'll find more frank conversation. But boy do they hate taxes. Oh, some of them may love them for others, but almost to a man they hate them for themselves. Which is why this throwaway fact amuses me so:
In 2009, the median salary for barbers in the U.S. was $24,160, only about 30.4 percent more than 1999's $18,530 (in nominal dollars), according to BLS data.

That, my friends, is some funny math. The article states that the median hair cut price is $13.18. So, if you assume that barbers work 50 weeks a year (2 weeks for vacation) and take about 10 holiday days, that means your average barber works 240 days a year. For that math to work out, it would mean that your average barber only does 7.63 haircuts a day. The three men who have cut my hair the most in my life all averaged their 8th haircut by about 1o am.

So what does that mean? Well, it means that your barber is paying taxes on all of those cash haircuts before noon. After that, Uncle Sam ceases to exist. And most seem to get away with this. More power to 'em.

The Return of 42

This is surreal. Can you even imagine Bush 43 turning over the Presidential podium to Bush 41?

Obama introduced Clinton lightly as "the other guy" and recalled how Clinton has overseen heady economic times. Obama warned that he wouldn't be staying long -- another White House Christmas party was waiting, as was his wife, Michelle.

And so it became clear pretty quickly that this was Clinton's show.

"I feel awkward being here, and now you're going to leave me all by myself," Clinton said from the stage of the White House briefing room.

Not that awkward.

Clinton comfortably outlined how the pending package of tax cuts, business incentives and unemployment benefits would boost the economy -- even though it included tax help for the wealthy that Obama had to swallow.

"There's never a perfect bipartisan bill in the eyes of a partisan," Clinton said. "But I really believe this will be a significant net-plus for the country."

Bill Clinton may have been a scuzz ball, but I'll give him this much: He was Presidential. That's more than I can say for The One.

Thursday, December 09, 2010

Pray They Don't Sing

Political tone deafness is a contagious disease in Washington. The degree to which the Democrats are inflicted right now is amazing.

The frustration with President Barack Obama over his tax cut compromise was palpable and even profane at Thursday’s House Democratic Caucus meeting.

One unidentified lawmaker went so far as to mutter “f— the president” while Rep. Shelley Berkley was defending the package the president negotiated with Republicans. Berkley confirmed the incident, although she declined to name the specific lawmaker.

Tee hee. Keep thinking your far left base is representative of the "real America" kiddos. That election that just happened was just an anomaly...

Monday, December 06, 2010

A Hate Crime and the MediaThought

This has been gnawing at me for a couple of months now. The Wisconsin media has been referring to some crimes at University of Wisconsin system schools as hate crimes. Hate crimes are unique in that you have to know who committed the crime and why. In most of these crimes, the who and the why have not yet been determined. They appear to be hate crimes. They are supposedly committed by hateful whites/straights. Allegedly, all of them are 100% true reports. If I'm not mistaken, supposedly, allegedly, and appear are all AP Style Guide approved words when there is still any doubt about the crime. Yet I see none of the Wisconsin media using them.

“If You See Something, Say Something”

I don't even know where to begin on this.
DHS announced Monday that they've partnered up with Wal-Mart to push their "If you See Something, Say Something" campaign. More than 230 stores started playing cautionary videos on monitors in check-out lines Monday, reminding Wal-Mart "shoppers to contact local law enforcement to report suspicious activity." Another 588 stores in 27 states will join the program in the next few weeks. According to DHS, the "partnership between DHS and Walmart to help the American public play an active role in ensuring the safety and security of our nation."
Really? When did Wal-Marts become seething cauldron's of terrorism? Did the underwear bomber get his Fruit of the Looms from a Wally World?

I'm a bit alarmed by the directions DHS has headed under Big Sis. From the new TSA policies at the airports that respond not to future threats but the last failed one, to frothing up paranoia amongst Americans towards one another at the discount store, DHS is more than a little out of control. Maybe Saint Russ, opponent of the Patriot Act, could take his last stand for civil liberties here. But don't count on it.

First, they let TSA ogle the sexy people at airports, and I said nothing. Next, they let TSA feel up and grope your mom, and I said nothing. And then when the old lady greeter at Wal-Mart snapped on a dirty latex glove and ordered me to spread 'em, sonny, there was nobody left. :p

Sunday, December 05, 2010

No, sir, the die is cast

That editorial that I fisked below keeps bringing this scene from the movie Tombstone to my mind:

Doc Holliday: Way ahead of yourselves, aren't you, boys? This is just another mining camp.
Behan: Have you seen how everyone dresses? Awful tony for a mining camp. No, sir, the die is cast. We are growing. Be as big as San Francisco in a few years and just as sophisticated-
[He's interrupted by gunshots, men yelling, and a brief, but fatal, gunfight in the street mere feet from where they stand]
Doc Holliday: [smirking] Very cosmopolitan.
[Behan glares at him]

This isn't literal, and I'm not comparing Wisconsin to a boom-bust mining town. But often we are over optimistic about our home towns, out home states, and our home regions. I think that editorial is clear evidence of that.

Fisking A JS Train Editorial, or Shooting Fish in Barrel

I've started to ignore anything the Journal Sentinal says about the Madison-Milwaukee not quite so very high speed train because, let's face it, this thing is dead and anything they say isn't going to matter. I chose to read "The Disconnect on Connections," though, because the author promised to use Wisconsin's transportation history to show why this train makes sense, and that interests me because I've actually been pondering the history of passenger trains and trolleys in Wisconsin's moderate-sized to large cities and their death in the face of the automobile.

What I found in the editorial was disappointing. It wasn't grounded in reality, and it was desperate. I'm going to leave the first half of the story alone as it uses Wisconsin's history of investing in cutting edge transportation as a mechanism to make the reader assume that a not so very high speed train is cut of the same cloth. I'd like to dig into those last several paragraphs a little, though.

The idea seems oddly nostalgic at first - why build passenger trains in the 21st century? - but it actually fits an emerging settlement pattern. Not in my lifetime but perhaps in my grandchildren's, and for better or worse, an interconnected megalopolis will sprawl from Benton Harbor, Mich., to Minneapolis-St. Paul. As the empty spaces fill in, there will be a demand for some form of transport that's faster than cars but has more frequent stops (and fewer exasperating waits) than airplanes.

Indeed, why? The arguments from supporters have been far from compelling. The "cool kids are doing it" argument doesn't cut it. The facts on the ground are that the demographics of the entire line, whether it be from Milwaukee to Madison or Milwaukee to Minneapolis, in no way support a train. So a vision is painted for us of a megalopolis from Michigan to Minnesota that is just a couple of generations away. I'm sorry, but that should set off any reasonable person's BS meter.

Chicago to Milwaukee is a major metropolitan entity right now, but it is far from a megalopolis. Now I agree with some of the studies/papers out there that say a megalopolis will form along the coast of Lake Michigan over multiple, multiple generations. But we are no where close to that. And the idea of a Benton Harbor to Minneapolis megalopolis is absurd. If you've been to the Northeastern corridor in this country, you know what makes a megalopolis. If you've driven the vast rural expanses along I-90 and I-94 to Minneapolis, you know that there is no way this corridor can build up to that extent in the next 100 years. There may be no reason for that corridor to ever become that urban, but even if it eventually did, high speed rail would be a quaint, antique technology by then.

Don't believe it's happening? Consider the city of Jefferson, just south of I-94, which has gained population in recent years despite a steady loss of jobs. Once the trading center for a prosperous farm region, Jefferson has increasingly become a bedroom community for white-collar workers commuting to Madison or Milwaukee. We can expect more of the same in years to come.

What?! Has the author ever been to Jefferson? Ever? I've absolutely zero evidence of Jefferson drawing white collar residents. Where are they living, next to the closed golf course? There are three towns of similar size in the postage stamp sized corner of the world: Jefferson, Whitewater, and Fort Atkinson. I don't see any of the three cities becoming bedroom communities for the white collar workers of Madison and Milwaukee. When we bought our home, I hoped that the housing boom would last long enough for Fort Atkinson to become a bedroom community of Madison, but it did not happen. And I assure you, in this market, Jefferson isn't, either.

Not that this matters, because this entire corridor would need to be drawing new citizens from out of state for new white collar jobs that are sprouting across Madison and Milwaukee. That isn't happening. Even my hopes of this area becoming a bedroom community weren't pinned on the type of new growth that would be required to support this train line. It was built on the fact that the price of real estate and the high taxes of Milwaukee and Madison were driving people out of those counties in search of homes. Population redistribution in a region does not make a train more viable.

As the price of gasoline reaches European levels, climbing to $4, then $5, then $6 a gallon; as our freeways creep closer to gridlock without exorbitant public subsidies (think $810 million for the Marquette Interchange, the exact cost of the entire Milwaukee-Madison rail project); and as the economic linkages between Midwestern cities become more apparent - doesn't high-speed rail begin to make sense?

Trains do not exist in a vacuum. They are also not an energy neutral. The rise in petroleum prices push those with any kind of energy flexibility to other sources, thus pushing up the costs of those energies. In this case, most likely coal power, which the Obama administration would already like to make more expensive for you. Those increased costs must either be shoulder by riders, who would already be paying a princely sum to ride the train, or by the government, i.e., government subsidies in perpetuity.

I wouldn't expect the system to have much impact on the poverty of Milwaukee's central city, and it's no substitute for a sound county transit system, but there's no doubt that starting the high-speed line today would help to meet future regional needs.

Again, I point out that this is a generation M solution for a problem that will not likely be evident until generation R, S, T, or even later. And by that time, it will almost certainly be a technology that is hopelessly behind the times.

An earlier generation of Wisconsinites did precisely the same thing. When our ancestors committed themselves to railroads, they were taking a chance, but the gamble paid off handsomely. In 1883, Alexander Mitchell, Wisconsin's railroad king, spoke plainly about what would have happened to Milwaukee without first-rate rail connections: "If it had not been for the enterprise and public spirit and liberality of the citizens of Milwaukee, both individually and collectively, Milwaukee today might have been no larger than Manitowoc or Sheboygan."

They were taking personal financial risk, first of all, although governments mitigated that somewhat. And the riskiness of the bets didn't lay in the mode of transportation, it was in particular lines. That is a huge difference. There were riches to be had if you bet on the right line. In this case, there is no promise of the sort. In fact, the history of Amtrak would indicate that this would be a vortex of cash with very little tangible or intangible benefit.

It's not the money; it's the connections. If the $810 million allocated to Wisconsin goes elsewhere, if high-speed rail never becomes a reality in our state, if the main line passes us by to the south and west, might not future generations condemn our own lack of "enterprise and public spirit"? Can we afford not to take the chance? Is that a bet Scott Walker really wants to make?

It certainly could go south and west, but it makes the line even less viable. Do you know how long it would take a not so very high speed train to travel from Chicago to Rockford to Iowa and up to Minneapolis, with all of the attendant stops in between? If you don't, try to brush up on your Pythagorean theorem. The mini legs between Town X, IL, and Chicago and Town Y, MN, and Minneapolis would make sense, but the much larger rider potential between the people of the Chicago Metro and the Twin Cities Metro would not because both air travel and automobile travel would be more efficient. Plus the line would bypass the two largest metros along the way, ceding valuable ridership. This train has to travel through Wisconsin to make any sense, and we can afford to wait for several generations. In fact, doing so might reward us with even better technology if and when the time comes that it does make sense. And with all the growth, assuming it actually occurs, the country would be much more able to afford it.

(Update 11:27: Now with linky goodness.)

Saturday, December 04, 2010

Trains, A Christmas Story

"Daddy, I want a train set for Christmas."

"What, son?"

"I want a train set. Trains are cool."

"Really? A train set? I think your grandpa wanted one once upon a time, too. Even got me one for Christmas once. It was kinda cool, I guess, but you realize it just goes over the same path over and over and over again, right?"

"I don't care. They're cool."

"They're pretty expensive, too. And daddy lost his job this year. This would be very difficult for us to pull off, son. Are you sure you want a toy that doesn't really do much outside of speed along the same track over and over again? "

"Daddy! Trains are cool. I WANT ONE!!!"

"Okay, bud. I get that. But why?"

"Because trains are cool, dad."

"Wouldn't you want something that you can be really flexible when playing with? Maybe a really nice Hot Wheels set? Or even a video game?"

"No, daddy! I want a train!"

"But why, son?"

"Because they are cool. Billy has one. And so does Sam."

"But son, will you actually play with it?"

"Umm, who said anything about playing with it, daddy? I want one because the cool kids have 'em."

"You aren't going to play with it if we sacrifice and maybe dip into your college fund to buy it, are you?"

"Daddy! Of course I will. But what's really important is that I can brag to Jimmy and Joe that I'm just like Billy and Sam."

"Son, I think that's good enough for me. You're getting a Hot Wheels set for Christmas."

Twilight Zone, Milwaukee Style

This sounds very weird.

For eight years, each man was the other's main political foil.

But in a joint interview, Milwaukee County Executive and Governor-elect Scott Walker and County Board Chairman Lee Holloway sound more like old buddies than frequent adversaries.

Their differences have been overblown, says Walker, who tells Holloway they accomplished a lot and that at least when Holloway disagreed he would come right out with his criticism.

If I remember, I'm going to be listening to this Sunday night because I am baffled. While it might make sense when it comes to future votes to make friends with Lee Holloway, on a moral plane I don't think I could personally have a buddy-buddy with a slumlord, no matter how much power he wields in Milwaukee.

Saturday, November 20, 2010

This Is The Most Repgunant Thing I've Ever Seen

Ever.

Update
I hope they hold true to their poll, because "give birth" is running away with things right now. But I hope they give the child up for adoption. He or she deserves parents that want it and not parents that are willing to offer up his or her life to the whims of total strangers on the internet. This is truly the most awful thing I've seen in my lifetime, and these two people are terrible human beings; not because they are willing to consider abortion, but because they are so cowardly that they are willing to forfeit the decision to a mass of strangers. It has taken a long time for the internet to truly revolt me, but finally it has.

Thursday, November 18, 2010

In Re FDA Regulation

So, the FDA is looking at restricting or banning alcoholic beverages that contain caffeine.

Does that mean that your rum & Coke, Jack & Coke are next? What about all of those Red Bull mixers?

Is this really something the FDA needs to wade into?

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Gluttons For Punishment

So, your leader leads you to the edge of a cliff, and then over said precipice. And then you put her back into her leadership position. In other areas of life, that makes you a masochist. Or in other words, a Russ Feingold supporter.

Retasking An Old Quote

If you make airline security kind of pervy, only pervs will be willing to fly. Or willing to work in the TSA.

Regret

I regret supporting John McCain's decision to make Sarah Palin his VP choice.

I still think that it was the best choice he had, but as we've seen, even a little identity politics wasn't enough to vault his moribund candidacy into an actual competition with Barack Obama.

Now the right is stuck with a person who has ample supporters but who has absolutely no chance of unseating President Obama. And rightfully so. As dreadful as Obama is, even I think his 4 miserable years of experience in the office would put him head and shoulders above Palin. IF she were the Republican nominee, I would have to seriously, seriously contemplate my vote in 2012. I'm not sure I can vote for her.

There is no gender bias in my opinion on this. I hope for a female or a minority star to emerge with 'presidential stuff' from the right. She isn't it. I'll give her credit, I think she has really worked hard towards that end in the past 2 years. But even with hard work in the next 2 years, I can't see it. If she keeps working, there is a chance that I'd see her as presidential in 2016 0r 2020. Maybe, if she really works on that resume. At the current time, no way. And I really don't want to see the right carrying that albatross around its neck going into 2012.

Monday, November 15, 2010

Economics Lesson

So we've embarked on the policy of 'quantitative easing' to fix the economy. In other words, to solve the economic struggles we brought on ourselves by spending money we don't have, our government is going to get us out of this by spending money it doesn't have.

Isn't that kind of like trying to get yourself out of an active heart attack by eating a Triple Baconator?

Dan Bice, Investigative Reporter by Day...

Milwaukee Journal Sentinel reporter Dan Bice is an unassuming investigative report by day but behind the disguise is the superhero Captain Obvious!

Today, via his investigative column, Captain Obvious shines the bright light on ... Wisconsin Governor Elect Scott Walker. Captain Obvious tells us that the universally hated road builders, when given a choice between a candidate that supports spending $800 million in federal money on not-so-very-fast train, and a candidate that wants to try to get that money converted for use on crumbling road infrastructure in the state, chose the candidate that wants the money used for roads!

Great job, Captain Obvious! Your crack reporting shows us what we could have already guessed yet again!

Saturday, November 13, 2010

Native American Mascots, From a Diferent Vantage Point

I had a conversation tonight with the lovely Mrs. Jib about Native American nicknames/logos/mascots. She came from a school that falls into that category. Frankly, this isn't a topic I care much about one way or the other. I think those who oppose them could do much better things with their time if they visited a reservation and lifted a finger to actually help real, breathing, Native Americans, whether with their hard work or their check books. And I think the defenders could improve their communities by taking any passions for these nicknames and using them instead to improve their hometowns. But my conversation with the lovely Mrs. Jib did teach me something.

The people in these communities? They aren't making fun of Native Americans. They aren't even ambivalent about them. They are fiercely proud of their association with them. And that gets lost in these debates. Opponents (and sorry, more often they are bleeding heart whites than actual Native Americans) often immediately tar supporters as racists, but it just isn't the case. Sometimes people are misguided and cartoonish in their portrayals, and that's wrong. But it doesn't change the pride people have in their communities' ties to Native America. You don't see American communities calling their schools the 'Brown Shirts' or the 'Grand Wizards'.

By scouring Native American references from our high schools and colleges, what we might be effectively doing is scouring Native America itself from the day to day conscience of most Americans. Face it, for most people, an encounter with an actual Native American is an extreme rarity. By removing their reference from daily life, we might be further removing any curiosity about the harsh realities of modern Native American life and increasing the likelihood that the stereotypes will win over.

Ted Koppel, You Had Me Until "Walter Cronkite"

Ted Koppel writes a nice little piece in the Washington Post lamenting the loss of 'objectivity' in the news media. He even had me buying in a bit until this:

Much of the American public used to gather before the electronic hearth every evening, separate but together, while Walter Cronkite, Chet Huntley, David Brinkley, Frank Reynolds and Howard K. Smith offered relatively unbiased accounts of information that their respective news organizations believed the public needed to know.

Please. Walter Cronkite? This is the man who broke the bonds of objectivity for the news media when he decided to editorialize on the Vietnam War. I don't care if you think he was right or wrong in doing so; you cannot argue that he made a giant leap into the subjective when he did.

This has been one of my long standing criticisms of journalism. Pure objectivity is impossible. You cannot report a news story in a way that anyone will pay attention by just stating the facts. Some, a rare few, make an admirable attempt at objectivity, but subjectivity always creeps into marketable news. Always. I prefer an open honesty about that subjectivity over trying to pretend to the objective while winning the public over to your side. Open subjectivity is not without its flaws, but I'll take it over converting from the shadows.

China Builds Fifteen Story Hotel in Six Days

True story. You can read more about it in my new book, "Buildings Jib Has Chosen Not To Die In". (HT Norm McDonald for that comedic styling)

Friday, November 05, 2010

Talgo Smells Fishy

Today Talgo, the Spanish train manufacturer that is a special friend of soon-to-be former Wisconsin Governor Jim Doyle, announce that they may not be able to stay in Milwaukee if the Madison to Milwaukee kind-of-but-not-so high speed rail line isn't built.

Pardon me, but I detect a foul marine odor.

A train line between two metropolitan areas that aren't what one would call major should not be enough to make a manufacturing site viable or not viable. Even if that location services the trains, that would not be enough to support 125 employees.

Frankly, and I had this suspicion from early on, I don't think that Talgo's Milwaukee presence was ever meant to be long term.

Governor Doyle went to Spain. Shortly after, we learn that Talgo has the contract for this line. And Talgo announces plans for Milwaukee. In the world of scummy politicians like Jim Doyle, it translated like this to me: We (Wisconsin) give you the contract for these trains. You scratch our (democrats, specifically, Jim Doyle's) back by building those trains in Milwaukee so we have added leverage. Afterward, stay or go, it doesn't matter because we will have our choo choo and you will have your money.

Am I speculating? Certainly. But nothing about this meets a basic logic sniff test. Nothing.