Friday, September 30, 2005

Billy Goat Tavern, D.C. style

The Billy Goat Tavern is opening a location in Washington D.C. Most people know Chicago's Billy Goat tavern as the source of the Cub's curse, or the SNL cheezeborga-cheezborga-cheezborga skit. For me, it was a hang out for a crusty old Chicago columnist, Mike Royko. The D.C. FIBS may enjoy this taste of home, but I doubt it would impress Royko much.

EU wants hand in the internet pie

The extra-national body that wanted to regulate how much chest construction workers and beer frauleins could show, the EU, now wants partial control over the internet:
The European Union insisted Friday that governments and the private sector must share the responsibility of overseeing the Internet, setting the stage for a showdown with the United States on the future of Internet governance.
OVER MY DEAD BODY. The EU is a hyper-regulating entity. What the U.S. does with the internet is not regulation but standardization. The internet is global resource because the U.S. doesn't regulate it heavily. The EU would run it into the ground. Imagine, you try to load your favorite site and you get this message:

We're sorry. Due to EU regulations, this site must only work 35 hours a week. When we return, it may take 3-5 years to load. Screw off, American.

Besides, the last thing anyone wants is a proliferation of Hasselhoff scheizer videos.

When Jiblog talks, people listen

Okay, maybe I give myself undeserved credit with that title. Regardless, WHO is starting to see my line of thought on the Avian flu:
The United Nations health agency warned against "scaremongering" over an expected global flu pandemic, a day after one of its officials said it could claim 150 million lives.

Dick Thompson, spokesman for the World Health Organization's (WHO) anti-flu operations, said it is nearly impossible to predict the death toll of a global crisis that experts fear could be fueled by Asia's bird flu outbreak.

People should be wary of any figure they hear, because all are based on "guesswork," he said.

"We can't be dragged into further scaremongering," Thompson told reporters.

Good. I'm glad to see a little bit of sense breaking out. Thompson needs to have a little talk with his own organization on this topic, though. As the article indicates, yesterday a WHO official said that the avian flu could kill between 5 million and 150 million people. If that is the most accurate estimate you can give, then you shouldn't even make the estimate because it's just a guess. Ask New Orleans and Louisiana officials where death count guesstimates get you.

Site stats fun, or Pranking bloggers

I can be a bit of a prankster. Whether my pranks are actually funny doesn't matter, because they are always funny to me. I don't go with the tried and the true very often, prefering to break new pranking ground. I think I have a fairly creative prank you can play on your favorite bloggers, and it is rather harmless. Here's the skinny.

Most bloggers I know get a kick out of strange searches that bring people to their site. The key here is to play off of that. For the purposes of my example, I am going to pick on The Crazy Rants of Samantha Burns. I went through Samantha's blog and picked out some funny words. The words I chose were Canadian beaver burns farts cars. I took those words and did a Google search for them (see here). When you chose an odd ensemble of words like this, the chances of your intended prank target coming high in the search are very good. In this case, Sam's site comes up 7th. Now click on the link so your search string is recorded by their site statistics.

From here you can go in several directions. You can regularly enter that search string into search engines and stealthily make your target think that there are a lot of freaks out there. Be willing to try new mixes of words to see if you can get them to mention one of your search hits at their site. Or you can post the search link (as I did above) and encourage your readers to click on it and then click on the prank target's site in the search. This will make them wonder what the hell made them the expert on your search term.

Caution: When posting your prank to involve your readers, two things will happen. You will quickly give your prank away, as your target may see your post on Technorati or TTLB. Second, you now have that search string in your blog, and if there are any freaks looking for those things, they will become all yours.

Give it a try. See if you can fool your favorite bloggers into mentioning your freakiest and most contrived search terms.

Philadelphia, The Next Great City

National Geographic Explorer calls Philly "The Next Great City." They obviously didn't finish that sentence; it should have finished up with " Get Yourself Killed In." I've done the Philly thing. I ain't impressed. Explorer has this to say:
Moreover, says urban planner Richard Florida, who wrote The Rise of the Creative Class, Philadelphia is showing itself to be an "open city," a term that separates America's urban dynamos like San Francisco and Miami from struggling cities like Cleveland and St. Louis. "Open cities welcome people—singles, gays, artists and individuals," he says. "They have excitement and a sense of creative energy."
A "Great City" is not made by homosexuals and free spirits alone. This is still a rather decayed city. Some of the suburbs have some good things going for them, and I'd agree that maybe Philly is undergoing a bit of a reanaissance. Great city? Not by a long shot. Booming economic growth often has as much to do with "Great City" status as being an open city. I'm not sure what makes Philly's economy so unique right now that it can reach that "Great" level. And those "Great" cities they mention were pretty clean, with lower crime rate, and shiny infrastructure (or at least shiny by Cleveland and St. Louis standards). Again, that isn't really Philly. At least not the Philly I grew to kind of know and generally loathe.

Thursday, September 29, 2005

Double Trouble

The Netherlands has allowed its first 'trio' civil union. I can't help but wonder if this poor, dumb bastard knows what he's getting himself into:
“I love both Bianca and Mirjam, so I am marrying them both,” Victor said. He had previously been married to Bianca. Two and a half years ago they met Mirjam Geven through an internet chatbox. Eight weeks later Mirjam deserted her husband and came to live with Victor and Bianca. After Mirjam’s divorce the threesome decided to marry.
Victor is already bald, so he doesn't have to worry about pulling his hair out, but now he's going to have to worry about getting caught in evil eye crossfires, frigid double cold shoulders, and the ignonimity of two wives kicking him out of bed and making him sleep on the couch. Silly rabbit.

The Great Panic of 200?

I am sympathetic with those who are trying to sound the alarm on the avian flu. We do need to prepare ourselves for the possibility of a pandemic. I still think that some of this alarm sounding is going to do more harm than good should there be a pandemic outbreak. There is a big difference between cautioning & educating the public and terrifying them. Terrified publics panic, and panic brings with it all new sets of problems.

I'm not going to name blogs that I think are guilty of this, but if you read blogs at all, I'm sure you can figure it out.

Wednesday, September 28, 2005


The right side of the blogosphere gossips like a bunch of old women when it comes to Supreme Court nominees. There is a common list of names being tossed around, but the hot name is Harriet Miers. Patience, everyone. The President caught us all off guard with the Roberts nomination. Why bother wasting the pixels speculating this time?

Post script
Miers may or may not be a fine choice, but if Bush were to go with her, he's going to prove that he's politically tone deaf of late. With accusations of 'cronyism' even coming from his right, now may not be the time for a Miers pick. (Yep, I can be seduced into being an old lady, too.)

Mr. Jib Jangles, dance

I started writing a long post here about all the things I wanted to write about tonight, but then I realized something. It was all an excuse for me to say that I'm taking a dance class with the lovely Mrs. Jib. So in the name of efficiency, I've cut out all the small talk. Yes, this son of a bitch conservative dances.


Commander in Chief premiered last night on ABC. I didn't watch it. But it led to a lot of people referring to the show as CIC. The correct abbreviation is CINC (ex: CINCPAC is Commander in Chief, Pacific), and the oft repeated error has been driving me nuts. Warren Bell at the Corner finally uses the correct abbreviation today. I'm hoping everyone else follows before I start pulling my hair out for an insanely stupid reason.

Brown, Blanco, and Nagin, Oh my!

I must say, the news of Michael Brown's testimony before a Senate panel yesterday and today's impending news of Kathleen Blanco's testimony is amusing. What we are watching is a great big game of of CYA. Getting worked up by or changing your opinion of them based on their testimony is a waste. Both are responsible parties for the FUBAR that was post-Katrina. The personal goals of their testimonies is to whitewash their own responsibility and stick as much blame as possible on others. I can't wait for Mayor Nagin to testify. Then we'll get the truth! (Tounge firmly in cheek)

Tuesday, September 27, 2005

Cuban embargo

Cuba is calling the U.S.'s embargo "economic war." Nice to see it took Fidel & Company 45 years to see that. Frankly, I don't think the embargo is anything but a nod by both parties to a big Cuban voting block in this country. Capitalism in Cuba would have done far more to undermine Cuba than this embargo has. Riches have a way of encouraging people to throw off the yoke of Communism.


For perhaps the last time this year, I am blogging outside with a Torano cigar in one hand, a beer at my side, and the Brewer post game on the radio. Tonight, beautiful, temperate fall. Tomorrow night, 38 degrees.

Media coverage of Katrina and the blogosphere

As mainstream media outlets (see LA Times & start letting us know that their coverage of Katrina was less than stellar (and factual), there are a lot of bloggers who are kicking themselves (this one included) for buying into the sensationalism. I know many established media outlets resent the blogs nipping at their heels, but I hope they realize that it is coverage like this that leads to it. If and when there is a next time, bloggers are not going to be willing to trust media reports from the scene if those reports seem excessive. Skepticism has set in further. It is true that many of us rely on msm reports to do a healthy portion of our blogging. It is also true that we hate receiving bad information. The MSM can now expect to be held to an even higher standard by a burned blogosphere.

Bush: Conserve gas

Is Karl Rove still in Washington? Because he can't be advising the President to tell the public to conserve gas. No, we learned from "wear sweaters" Jimmy Carter that a president is best leaving that type of advice to underlings. Don't get me wrong, there is nothing bad about the government encouraging responsible consumption of gasoline right now. Historically speaking, though, Americans find it demoralizing to get that advice from the President in a non-crisis scenario.

Jiblog on the BBC

Interesting. Jiblog made its way into an article on the Beebs:
From the Francophobic Jiblog to the Bush-sceptic Gekido's Lair, there's a feeling that anything that empowers bloggers must be a good thing.
I'm pretty pleased. Francophobic is probably the nicest thing the BBC could have said about me.

Monday, September 26, 2005

Media "apocolypse-ism" revisited

Immediately after Hurricane Katrina, but before the major flooding of that Tuesday, I accused the media of blowing the story way out of proportion, calling it "apocolypse-ism" (awkward, term, yes-but accurate). I recanted as all seemed to go to hell in a handbasket. It seems I should have held my ground, as reports it wasn't as bad as we were led to believe:
Following days of internationally reported killings, rapes and gang violence inside the Dome, the doctor from FEMA - Beron doesn't remember his name - came prepared for a grisly scene: He brought a refrigerated 18-wheeler and three doctors to process bodies.

"I've got a report of 200 bodies in the Dome," Beron recalls the doctor saying.

The real total was six, Beron said.

Of those, four died of natural causes, one overdosed and another jumped to his death in an apparent suicide, said Beron, who personally oversaw the turning over of bodies from a Dome freezer, where they lay atop melting bags of ice.
Here's something else to question. Many reporters claimed bodies were floating all over the place. The current death toll would indicate some floating corpses may have been spotted, but in no where near the numbers we were lead to believe. Reporting rumors as fact and exagerating what you see with your own eyes is bad, bad journalism.

(HT Stand in the Trenches)

Category XXX Pacific tropical cyclone

Umm, I wonder if the FCC is going to fine networks for discussing this Pacific tropical cyclone.

Reports: Sheehan arrested for protest

I guess being ridiculously compared to Rosa Parks wasn't good enough for Cindy Sheehan. Now she wants to be fatuously compared to Martin Luther King.

The era of irresponsibility returns? Probably not.

Going back to me college days, I've viewed the Vietnam time frame as America's era of irresponsibility. It was a time where people-mostly young adults-cast away personal responsibility like they cast away their clothes at Woodstock. They found fertile ground to act out their irresponsibility in a society fatigued by sensationalized negative news from the war. And with the war requiring many young men of that generation to become soldiers carrying the responsibilities of their nation on their shoulders, the anti-war movement blossomed.

Today we are seeing a parallel movement of irresponsibility. The lede in a Washington Post article sets the scene:
Out there, in front of the Washington Monument, it was eerily reminiscent of another place and time, a time when the Old Guard was young and the Young Guard didn't yet exist, and people made a point of not putting their trust in anyone over a certain age. A whiff of weed wafted on the air. Couples made out in the grass, oblivious to anyone but each other. Onstage, Joan Baez stood solo, guitar strapped like a weapon against her chest, crooning "Where have all the flowers gone?" while people stood swaying, some crying, fingers forming peace signs or holding up posters of Che.

Some of the ingredients from the 1960's and 1970's are in place, but I'm not sure that today's anti-war movement can blossom in the same way.

The Vietnam era anti-war movement was as much a youth revolt against the impending responsibilities of adult responsibilities as it was a revolt against the war. Most of those old peaceniks eventually accepted the responsibilities of adulthood, but have always looked back romantically on their days of free love, cheap drugs, and intoxicating political influence. Today it is these graying old peaceniks that are leading the anti-war movement. This in and of itself puts a cap on the youth involvement. No self respecting young adult wants to make out with and grope their boyfriend/girlfriend at a protest while sitting right next to their parents who are doing likewise. One of the key factors in the 60's and 70's was impetuous youth revolting against their elders. Today, it would require the young to link arms with their elders-hardly an explosive and seductive mixture for the young.

Second, the young today have less reason to rebel at the responsibilities of war. It is their choice to join or not join the military. They don't feel that military service is a yoke being placed on them by older generations. That is the second powder keg of the 60's and 70's that is non-existent today.

So take stories like the one in yesterday's Washington Post. We are seeing a resurgence of irresponsibility today, but it is being led by a group of graying former hippies looking to regain their glory days, as well as some America hating groups. The smaller number of young adults involved are just along for the ride for the most part. Many more have to reason or motivation to join this self righteous movement.

An inside look at pork

Robert Novak takes an inside look at the debate within the Republican Party on pork. It is not an encouraging sight for conservatives.
Hastert believes it is not just the privilege but the duty of a House member to deliver federal projects to his constituents. Many younger conservatives could not disagree more, but most -- like Pence -- are loyal Republicans who are loath to criticize their leaders.
The message is not sinking in. We've applied pressure to the Republicans we've elected, and many of them are just brushing us off.

9/27 Edited to read "pork" in title. Not sure what the hell prok is.

"I offer you the opportunity to join me in glorious battle"

I am so buying this.

For those of you who are Stewie Griffin fans, you can listen to some of his greatest quotes here. One of my favorites is, "Damn you and your estrogenical treachery!" Sounds like something that Bill Clinton may say to Hillary.

Magnetics-energy source of the future

I am not a scientist, so take this with a grain of salt, but doesn't it seem logical that we aren't making the most out of the potential of magnetics yet? Something like electromagnetic induction seems like a cheap and easy source of energy for lower level energy needs.


Don Surber makes a comparison between the number of anti-war protestors in Washington D.C. this weekend and another similar sized group of people:
300,000. Isn't that the number of people found in mass graves scattered across Iraq? I guess they are Rest In Peace protesters.
Couldn't have said it better.

Sunday, September 25, 2005

Hillary on the internet, circa 1998

Drudge is running a flashback right now on Hillary Clinton's view on internet news circa 1998. Here is Hillary from 7 years ago:
"We are all going to have to rethink how we deal with this, because there are all these competing values ... Without any kind of editing function or gatekeeping function, what does it mean to have the right to defend your reputation?" she said.

Hillary Clinton Continued:

"I don't have any clue about what we're going to do legally, regulatorily, technologically -- I don't have a clue. But I do think we always have to keep competing interests in balance. I'm a big pro-balance person. That's why I love the founders -- checks and balances; accountable power. Anytime an individual or an institution or an invention leaps so far out ahead of that balance and throws a system, whatever it might be -- political, economic, technological --out of balance, you've got a problem, because then it can lead to the oppression people's rights, it can lead to the manipulation of information, it can lead to all kinds of bad outcomes which we have seen historically. So we're going to have to deal with that. And I hope a lot of smart people are going to --"

REPORTER: Sounds like you favor regulation.

MRS. CLINTON: Bill, I don't know what -- that's why I said I don't know what I'm in favor of. And I don't know enough to know what to be in favor of, because I think it's one of those new issues we've got to address. We've got to see whether our existing laws protect people's right of privacy, protect them against defamation. And if they can, how do you do that when you can press a button and you can't take it back. So I think we have to tread carefully.
Can Hillary credibly flip-flop on this by 2008? Most likely, but this is something the blogosphere needs to keep in the back of its mind. As Hillary professed her love for the founders, she spit all over their First Amendment to the Constitution.

Nature's silver linings

Nature has a wonderful way of replenishing itself and maintaining balances. Man can wreak havoc on it, but we have to work very hard to do so. And sometimes natural catastrophes are catastrophic to humans, but beneficial for nature. Take last December's tsunami:
From atop the coconut tree where he fled to escape the onrushing water, Muhammad Yacob watched the tsunami turn his rice paddy into a briny, debris-strewn swamp.

Nine months later, Yacob and his wife are harvesting their best-ever crop — despite fears that salt water had poisoned the land.

"The sea water turned out to be a great fertilizer," said Yacob, 66, during a break from scything the green shoots and laying them in bunches on the stubble. "We are looking at yields twice as high as last year."
Farmers say vegetables, peanuts and fruit are also growing well, spurring hopes that agriculture in the still devastated region will recover faster than expected.

One of the biggest fallacies the environmental movement has ever pushed on the public is that the environmental is "fragile." The environment of this planet is a lot more durable and vibrant than they publicly give it credit for. Human life is much more fragile than our environment.

Fire Sherman

The Green Bay Packers laid another turd today, and Coach Sherman laid one of his own in the post game press conference. I think Tim Van Vooren said it best on the Fox 6 post game when he described it as "resignation" (not that resignation, though). It was the most disturbing post game press conference I've ever seen by a Packer coach. Zero emotion. Zero anger. He was quiet. He stuttered through every answer. It seemed like he didn't even want to be there.

Sherman's behavior at this press conference was one of a defeated man. It was as though he has already resigned himself to a terrible year and possibly the loss of his job. He looked like a loser, and that was enough to convince me that he has to go, now. The poor decisions were bad enough, but this team is trying to rebuild on a young core. It doesn't need him infecting it with a loser's attitude.

Additionally, this is going to be Aaron Rogers team in a year or two. It was comforting to know that Mike Holmgren was in charge of Favre's development back in the day because Holmgren chewed his ass when necessary, but always gave him enough rope to learn. Is anyone comfortable with Roger's development being, at least in part, in Sherman's hands? I'm not. He's proven himself incapable of developing young guys. He does okay with veteran teams, but when it comes to developing talent, he's not very good. I can't imagine a successful Rogers era if Sherman is his coach.

Is it time for the Packers to just cut their losses with Sherman? I'm beginning to think that it is, but I have a few concerns. If they were to fire Sherman tomorrow, Jim Bates would likely become the interim coach. That means the defense, which has actually been approaching respectable, will be in someone else's hands, but more importantly, it means that the offense will be completely in Rossley's hands. The only saving grace for that offense is Sherman's involvement. Providing Rossley's health held, this offense would be mired even deeper in quicksand than it already is. And I don't know how wise it is to change offensive coordinator in the middle of the year.

This season is swirling down the drain. Maybe we should just flush some of the turds down with it right now.

(Cross posted at The Wisconsin Sports Bar)

Saturday, September 24, 2005

The parent I strive to be one day

The lovely Mrs. Jib and I have not yet decided to procreate and bless this world with our comingled genetic material. But when that day comes, Heather Armstrong at Dooce exemplifies the type of parent I strive to be:
Just now Leta discovered that she could stick her finger into her own nostril. My instinct was to cheer her on and tell her, “Pick a winner, little one. Pick a winner!”
Related to this, I plan to potty train my kids in record time, but I will teach them that if they are going to fill their pants, they should give it every once of effort they have. Grunting would be perfectly acceptable.

Pope Bernard Law?

In a rare break in the silence surrounding Papal Conclaves, an Italian Cardinal has released a diary about the event. If you are a Catholic, there is a lot of interesting information to be had. I'm not, so this is the one thing that really stuck out to me:
Finally, the diary includes a few surprises, including a vote in the final ballot for Cardinal Bernard Law, forced to resign as Boston archbishop because of the church sex abuse scandal.
I'm sure this was some sort of a protest vote, but are you kidding me? This is who an individual chose to vote for? A man who presided over a huge pedophilia scandal. I can't make up my mind about whether it was in bad taste, stupid, or both.

Saturday morning sights

This morning I had to go to a car show to visit with someone. This show had a huge exhibit area, and since I did not know where the person I was meeting was located, I had to walk the whole thing. Here are some of the things I saw.

-A guy selling cans of what he called "Fish Assholes". I have no idea what was really in the cans.
-Another guy was selling "real Cuban Cigars!" Hand rolled, even. The price for these exquisite and illegal treats? $4. Or 3 for $10.
-A guy who literally had 3 teeth.
-A true country cowgirl. She even had the chewing tobacco in her back pocket. Not everyday that you see that.
-More rusted out crap than a Ford junkyard.

Here's what I didn't see. The guy I was supposed to meet with. Couldn't be found. I walked through Sanford & Sons for 2 hours for nothing.

(note: I pondered taking pictures of the above. I decided I may not make it out alive if I did.)

Friday, September 23, 2005

Hold off on that Condi victory parade

The Condoleeza Rice for President movement has experieced quite the groundswell in the last year or so, but don't go planning that victory parade yet. She has plenty of time between now and the primaries to lose that support.

Rice's State Department is beginning to take an 'Arabist' approach to the Middle East in general, and towards Israel specifically. This isn't going to play well with what would be Rice's base in a primary. Conservative blog chatter is beginning to pick up on this Arabist approach, and the talk isn't positive.

Small blessings...

...thank God for them. Rita has weakened to a category 3 storm. Still nasty, but not as nasty as Miss Katrina.

As good as it gets?

Jonah Goldberg brings us the depressing thought of the week for Conservatives, namely that right now is "as good as it gets."
In other words, my real fear is that this is as good as it gets. Conservatives may have to look forward to years of incremental victories, less-than-incremental setbacks, cronyism, hypocrisy, rent-seeking, and the sort of pragmatic compromise which inevitably grinds down intellectual joy and entrepreneurialism. This isn’t because Republicans are worse than Democrats (by any historical measure Democrats have been vastly more corrupt than Republicans — though Republicans are better at getting caught). It’s because that’s the nature of the beast.

Running things is better than the alternative, but some days that just doesn’t feel like it’s good enough.
He makes an interesting case for why the Republicans are in the midst of governing for a generation. I think the Republicans are far more likely to develop a schism than the Democrats, though, which could end that electoral reign quickly.

Quote of the Day

"Duty, honor, country: Those three hallowed words reverently dictate what you ought to be, what you can be, what you will be. They are your rallying point to build courage when courage seems to fail, to regain faith when there seems to be little course for faith, to create hope when hope becomes forlorn." ~General Douglass McArthur

The false expectations of the Interstate system

Much criticism is being heaped on Houston and the State of Texas (and I'm sure in some circles, the Feds) for the slow evacuation of the Texas coast near Houston and Galveston. For many, the backed up, non-moving traffic on the Intersates are a metaphor for the incompetence of government. Perhaps it is, but this is not what our Interstate highway system was designed for. Instead, it was designed to move military forces quickly and efficiently during an national emergency. During that time, civilian traffic could be kept off the highways via their limited access points to allow the quick travel of military forces. They were never intended to move 2 million people over a very small geographic area in a quick fashion. Hell, they weren't even designed for the modern rush hour. Undoubtedly, we are going to see cries after Hurricane Rita to dump more money into Interstate highway development. I'm not saying that is a bad thing, but it is not the right thing for this problem. I do not know of a highway system that could handle this volume of traffic across this small an area in this short of time. Even the vaunted Autobahn would be busting at the seams if presented with this dense volume of traffic. Most cities evacuation plans depend on the Interstate highways; you may be better off developing your own exit plan via back roads, though, with alternatives should you find your path blocked.

French do something worthwhile...

...for a change. The AP reports that Reporters Without Borders sees bloggers in nations such as China and Iran as the only autonomous source of reporting available from those countries. So they've published a guide, the "Handbook for Bloggers and Cyber-Dissidents," which was financed in part by the French Foreign Ministry. The purpose of the guide is to help bloggers in these countries maintain their annonymity, and thus, their safety and ability to report. Do you think our own State Department would fund such a thing without a terrible internal battle?

Which reminds me-with McCain-Feingold kicking in against blogs, where do I get my copy?

Thursday, September 22, 2005


Good lord, this blog makes me feel guilty. I am again suffering with a nasty head cold today, and I'm refraining from writing too much because I'm just not making sense when I try. I'm feeling a bit better today, and I'm planning on doubling up on that wonderful Nyquil stuff tonight, and plan to be back at it full speed tomorrow in the afternoon.

Guess the weapon

After Pearl Harbor, the United States went to work on a top secret weapon to use on Japan. Here are some hints. Can you guess the weapon?

*This weapons program had the personal go ahead from Franklin D. Roosevelt.
*Scientists had to go out of their way to find the raw material for this weapon.
*Special casings and ignitors had to be designed for this weapon.
*The weapon was tested in the desert southwest.
*The weapon, if deployed correctly, would destroy thousands of buildings in Japan.
*The weapon was never deployed

Do you know what the weapon was?

It was the bat fire bomb.


While it is way too early to say where Hurricane Rita will make landfall, if it does take a bee line toward Galveston, keep in your thoughts and prayers the Galveston police officers and firefighters. The city has very little buffer against storm surge, and most of it is around 8 feet above sea level. Still, 180 police officers and 117 firefighters are going to stay behind for emergency services in the city. That, folks, is bald-faced courage.

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

Talk like a Yooper Day

In discussing Talk like a Pirate Day, Lance Burri has brought up "Talk like a Yooper Day." (For those of you not from the upper Midwest, a Yooper is a citizen of Michigan's U.P.) I love the idea. I propose that it take place on the first Sunday (or Monday) of the Wisconsin gun deer hunting season with a home Packer game. In the case of those rare seasons where the Packers do not have a home game during deer hunting, then it should take place during the second week of deer camp. Ya der hey!

Global warming worse than first thought; actually solar system warming

World leaders were stunned Tuesday by the news that Mars' polar caps are melting. NASA's Mars Global Surveyor detected the changes via photographs of the red plant's surface.

Major environmental groups were beside themselves at the news.

"This just goes to show that our worst fears are being realized. Not only has man's intervention in the delicate earth ecosystem caused irreparable harm to our planet, but it is apparently the rest of the solar system as well," said Green Peace spokeswoman Jan Petrovoskin.

"We believe that instead of man causing global warming, he is actually causing solar system or even galaxial warming. While we cannot directly measure this, we believe increased storm intensity on Jupiter shows a clear trend."

Green Peace is expected to introduce a new save the solar system plan next week that will ban all carbon dioxide emissions, flatulent cows, space exploration of any type, and a quick, brutal extermination of the human species..

"After years of careful consideration, we've come to the conclusion that humans have too much of an adverse affect on the ecosystems we live in. The only way to stop this warming from spreading to the entire universe is the annihilation of mankind," said Petrovoskin.

Early indications are that British Prime Minister is eager to be the first world leader to sign onto the Green Peace initiative, provided that Green Peace assure him that it will not negatively impact future economic growth.

(This was the satire of an ill blogger)

"Don't get stuck on stupid"

You have to love how military types can express things in ways we civilians can't. Don't get stuck on stupid is great.

Tuesday, September 20, 2005


I'm sitting here with the lovely Mrs. Jib and her sister watching the season premier of Nip/Tuck, and all I can think is, "when did FX become Cinemax?"


No, not Kevin. And I'm not going to complain about NASA again. Nope, that adjective describes me right now. I've felt a head cold coming on for a few days, but today it sucker punched me right in the sinuses. I'm left feeling like my abundant mucus is forcing my brain out of my cranium. So for tonight, no deep thoughts will coming from this Jack Handey.

Government spending

There is a good conversation going on over at the Badger Blog Alliance on pork barrel spending. The fact of the matter is Republicans are just playing the old Washington game-lavish the voters with gifts, and they'll return you to power. It was a game that Democrats played masterfully for 60 years. What Republicans don't understand, though, is that the rules of the game have changed. The public is getting a little more savvy on Federal Budgets, and the American sense of self sufficiency is telling them that they don't want to see out of control budgets anymore.

This is a lesson Washington Republicans should have learned in 1994 when the Republican Revolution swept control of Congress to the Republicans. They didn't, though. Take a gander at Joe Scarborough's book on that time period, Rome wasn't Burnt in a Day. The pre-existing Republican leadership did not learn a lesson from that, and they stymied a number of talented younf fiscal conservatives.

If Republicans are lucky, the current din over government spending will not turn into a large roar in time for the 2006 elections. I don't think that they will be so fortunate, though. This is a topic that has Conservatives preaching to the choir in the middle and to the Democrats in the wings on the left. They should have learned this lesson in 1994. Instead, they'll need to learn it the hard way in 2006.

See also this article, The GOP's New New Deal.


Right Wing News today registers concern over this Czech plan which built a bridge over a street so squirrels could cross the street safely. His concern is that this silly plan would catch on over here. My concern is this:
Squirrels are a protected species in the Czech Republic.
What? Protected species? Did the old communist regime round up the little beasts and ship them off to Siberia? If the Czechs are that short of squirrels, I can round about 20 of the little bastages up in short time and send them to them. Squirrels around here are getting terribly aggressive. I saw three of the little thug rodents beat up on a cat on Sunday, and there is one that likes to stand on its hind legs as I drive towards it, daring me not to stop.

Making squirrels a protected species is my concern for here in the states. Because while I may defy that squirrel's dare, the day he double dog dares me...

Monday, September 19, 2005

Goodbye, Neon

The fact that I own one not withstanding, I am not going to miss the Neon. Chrysler will be ending the production of Neons on Friday when the last car comes off the line in Belvidere, Illinois. My Neon has earned my begrudged respect, but I've never liked them. When Chrysler introduced the model, the marketing campaign revolved around one word: Hello. Neon, tonight I say to you, "goodbye."

Oliver Twist

Am I the only disturbed by the fact that the new Oliver Twist movie is "A Roman Polanski Film"?

Oil bubble

This tells me that even OPEC is sensing a bubble in oil prices:
OPEC oil producers on Sunday wavered over a supply increase that would aim to allay consumer country concerns about energy security after Hurricane Katrina pushed crude over $70 a barrel.
Some said they were reluctant to sanction additional crude when global refining is too stretched to process more.

"The market should rest assured that whatever it needs is there. Before that there is no need to do anything," said Nigerian Oil Minister Edmund Daukoru.

Supply is up. Demand is down. Capacity is tight. Bubble.

Love Story

Mrs. Jib and I watched Crash tonight, and you can see my opinion of that below. Now we're watching Love Story on cable. All I can say about Love Story is that I feel sorry for the poor, dumb bastard who bought that soundtrack. Happy Love Story theme. *Smile* Angry Love Story Theme. *Grr* Sad Love Story Theme. *Sob* Repeat.

How could I forget "Foreboding Love Story Theme (with car horn accompaniment)"?

Sunday, September 18, 2005


Tripe (n)
1. Lining of a cow's stomach
2. Something of no value
3. The movie Crash.


I hate the term Czar as it is applied to Federal Government officials. In fact, I hate it so much that I will not use that term here. If there is a New Orleans reconstruction Czar appointed, I will forever refer to that individual as Cesar. Czar has no more place in the American political lexicon than king, emperor, Cesar, or tsar.

An ounce of prevention

Here's the headline from Reuters:
New Orleans opens to business despite warnings
Here's the current projected path for tropical storm Rita.

Now, who do you think should tell the citizens of a city "please do not come back yet, it isn't safe for you yet," the mayor of said city or the President of the United States? If you said the mayor, you get a gold star. Unfortunately, it'll have to be the President, because the mayor is welcoming people back with open arms. Pray that Rita follows a path into Mexico or Texas, because the mayor of New Orleans is putting his citizens back at risk.

The President is expressing his reservations about the city reopening. Good. It's about all he can do. The rest is on Nagin's shoulders.

Update 2
Mayor Nagin is doing the right thing, finally. I appreciate the position he was in the-the city needs economic activity for local government to function, but opening the city up now was the wrong decision at the wrong time.


It was rough seeing Reggie White's widow Sarah cry at half time of the Packer game at the retirement of big 92. Love or hate his opinions, Reggie was all heart.

Beware coaches who make students run...

...because they have sex with minors. Illogical, you say? You're right. In a story about a female gym teacher that had sexual contact with three underage boys, the Hammonton News includes this quote from a student on the girls soccer team:
Asked about her former coach, senior Samantha Candario said, "I liked her as a coach. She did make us run a lot."
That is an odd student quote to add to an article on a teacher accused of sexual assault. It is an innocent statement on its own, but in the context of the article, it reads more like this, though: "She was a good coach. But now that I think of it, she did make us run a lot. I should have known!" But even better is the student's follow up statement:
"I just don't think it was fair to the team."
Wow. The reporter on this story managed to find the most vapid and self absorbed girl on the soccer team to quote. Three teenage boys were taken advantage of by an adult woman, and she's concerned about her soccer team. It makes me wonder if the reporter intended for the girl to look like an ass, but it also makes me wonder why the editor didn't cut this quote that is inconsequential to the story.

And no, I can't give back the 30 seconds of your life that you spent on reading this post. You may exchange it for not reading a post of equal value, though.


Well, Kenny Chesney had put to bed a certain rumor for about 4 months. Now that Renee Zellweger has filed for anulment of their marriage due to fraud, that ugly little rumor hiding in the closet is going to come back out with twice the ferocity. I know Chesney has a lot of female fans that are ga-ga over him; sorry ladies, but maybe you should have been thankful when he got married. Hold out hope though. Maybe he can defraud you next.

Thank you, Grey Lady

Tomorrow the New York Times' opinion columnists go under web lock down-that is to say, you have to pay to read them. The Times obviously over-estimates the demand for their columnists. The number of eyes that see the rantings and ragings of Dowd, Krugman, et al, is going to drop precipitously, and for this, I'd like to thank the Times. Many (but not all) of their columnists have had an outsized influence on public opinion that is not justified by their talents. I'm glad to see that the Times is righting that wrong, even if they don't realize that yet.

An observation on fishing

While not an avid fisherman, I have been fishing in some capacity for 24 years now. There is one common thread to all 24 of those years and all the people I've gone fishing with. Without exception, I've always heard this: "This lake/river/creek/spot is not nearly as good as it used to be." That leaves me wondering if all people had to do in 1940 is motor their boat out into a body of water and the fish just jumped into the boat for you.

Saturday, September 17, 2005

Constitution Day

Today is Constitution Day. Celebrate by boning up on on the U.S. Constitution, or do as I will be doing shortly here-reflect somberly on topics such as stare decisis, judicial review, and Marbury v. Madison while fishing.

Overnight Delivery

I am a sucker for sap. If someone looked through my CD and DVD collection without knowing who it belonged to, they'd probably swear it belonged to a woman or a gay guy (so much for that John Wayne image). With Reese Witherspoon's new movie Just Like Heaven quietly making some waves (an anti-Million Dollar Baby?), it is time that I recommend a Witherspoon blast from the past that is an undiscovered, but sappy, gem: Overnight Delivery.

The movie stars Witherspoon and Paul Rudd. Without giving too much away, Witherspoon's stripper coed character Ivy Miller helps Trips (Rudd) get even with his cheating girlfriend by overnighting a nasty breakup package. Once upon a time, this movie was on Showtime and HBO constantly. Now, you are lucky to find it on DVD. If you are at the local Blockbuster and can't decide on a movie, Overnight Delivery comes highly recommended from Mrs. Jib and I. Even if it has a schmaltzy ending.

Next embarrassing Jib media recommendation: Cutting Edge. Stay tuned!

Friday, September 16, 2005

How ambitious

During the 1960's, a time where computers took up entire rooms, we put men on the moon is less than 9 years. Today, NASA hopes we can go back in 13 years.
NASA hopes to return astronauts to the moon by 2018, nearly a half-century after men last walked the lunar surface, by using a distinctly retro combination of space shuttle and Apollo rocket parts.
Umm, real ambitious goal you have there, guys. What say you?
"It has several elements to it. One is to say that the people who did Apollo were pretty smart," Logsdon said Friday. Depending on advanced, unproven technology would slow everything down and raise the costs, which will be high anyway, he noted.
So, if I understand this correctly, it will take 13 years to get back to the moon using technology we have had for over 30 years? Yep, the Apollo people were pretty smart. Apparently much smarter than our current NASA employees.

Hello Firefox

Ugh, I really don't like the news that Microsoft is looking at investing in AOL. I'm already disappointed in the Netscape 8.0 series of browsers. If Microsoft ends up with a healthy ownership stake in AOL, I fear for the future of the Netscape browser. I'm already protecting my Netscape 7.2 like a starving caveman defending his fresh wooly mamouth from the saber tooth tigers. If it comes to pass, I may be forced to go to my number 2 choice, Firefox. That's provided Microsoft doesn't manage to choke off some of Mozilla's funds through this investment.

HuffPo reaches negative IQ!

Okay, I said a while ago that I was going to stop reading and writing about it, but I can't help myself here. Bob Cesca criticizes President Bush...because he didn't button the top button of his shirt last night. Actually, he thought the President had mis-buttoned the shirt. I encourage you not to read it. The fact that I wrote this post is proof that your own IQ temproarily drops 25 points after being exposed to it.

New Orleans poverty fight to be a success. But Houston?

Last night in his speech, President Bush made defeating the area's poverty part of the recovery's goal. He shouldn't have too much trouble scoring a victory on that one:
Fewer than half of all New Orleans evacuees living in emergency shelters here said they will move back home, while two-thirds of those who want to relocate planned to settle permanently in the Houston area, according to a survey by The Washington Post, the Henry J. Kaiser Family Foundation and the Harvard School of Public Health.
With land speculation already heating up in New Orleans, it is looking like New Orleans will be a much different city when rebuilt. With the poor relocating to new locales, it'll be richer. If the President is going to try to defeat the poverty of Katrina victims, he had better look towards Houston to do it, because that city and the state of Texas are going to have a host of new social issues to wrestle with.

Business Week has some interesting ideas on revitalizing New Orleans.

The lesser of two evils

St. Paul is about to close down the last adult video arcade in the city. It is doing so thanks to the Kelo decision. The arcade and adjoining liquor store were not well liked by the city fathers, who wanted to clean up that corner of the city. The arcade and liquor store had followed city codes and rules, though, making it tough for the city to shut down. The arcade owner was set to sell the property & liquor license for well above the value of the real estate, but that wasn't enough control for St. Paul. They have voted to condemn the property so another company can build a 21,000-square-foot retail establishment in its place.

As much as I hate to say it, the adult video arcade is the lesser of two evils here. This is how municipalities can succesfully create cover for actions made possible for them by the Kelo decision. Start by condemning something that the public will not be upset by, in this case a seedy adult establishment, and then turn it over to the commercial entity of your choice. Then when you want to condemn a neighborhood in the future to allow a company to build a mall or some corporate offices, you have people right where you want them. Because they did not stand up for the guy who owned the dirty movie store, the property owners of the city have just weakened themselves against future land grabs. I expect to see more cities gradually expand their new eminent domain powers in this way.

9/11 Memorial, From Russia with Love

This story went very unnoticed yesterday. Vladamir Putin was in Bayonne, New Jersey, for the ceremonial ground breaking for a 10 story monument to 9/11. Apparently, the memorial, designed and built by a Russian artist, was originally destined for Jersey City, but it received heavy criticism from people who thought American artists should be commisioned for any memorial, and others who thought it was "corny." The memorial will be a focal point for those who enter New York Harbor, and given the controversial memorial plans in Pennsylvania and for the new Freedom Tower site, I personally think this memorial (see pic) strikes just the right chord.

Thursday, September 15, 2005

The pledge, God, and the Ninth Circuit

I don't really have the time to research or opine on this right now, but a group is saying that Ninth Circuit ignored Supreme Court instructions in yesterday's decision that the words "Under God" were unconstitutional. I recommend it cautiously because I know nothing about this group except that they believe in originalist readings of the constitution. Read it here.

A normal finger amongst sore thumbs

Las Vegas has long been a city of gaudiness, of making your building on the strip stick out like a sore thumb. Given the look of the strip, this design for a new complex right on the strip by MGM Mirage is odd. It's bizarre because it would be a gem in any other city in America, except Las Vegas. It is going to stick out because it is huge and it looks so, well, normal.

Coffee has that affect on me, too, Mr. President

Reuters decided to run with a photo of a note President Bush was writing that indicated he had to go to the bathroom. It's funny, but a bizarre decision on Reuters' part. Yes, America, your President does do number ones and number twos. I bet that once in a while he even toots on Air Force One.

Hammer of Truth questions the note, as it changes from printing to hand writing after the question mark. The picture smells kind of funny to me as well, but it is very possible the President printed this informal note and went to cursive for the note being written at the moment of the snapshot. I am one who flips back and forth between printing and cursive a lot, so that is not definitive proof. One thing that does gnaw at me is how dark the writing is. A pencil is being used, and it looks as dark as a ball point pen. But that is not definitive proof of anything, either.

DeLay(ed) stupidity

Tom DeLay has weathered attack after attack from the left and come out no worse for wear. So what does DeLay go and do? He opens his big mouth and says something so stupid that no right thinking person can believe it:
House Majority Leader Tom DeLay said yesterday that Republicans have done so well in cutting spending that he declared an "ongoing victory," and said there is simply no fat left to cut in the federal budget.
Mr. DeLay was defending Republicans' choice to borrow money and add to this year's expected $331 billion deficit to pay for Hurricane Katrina relief. Some Republicans have said Congress should make cuts in other areas, but Mr. DeLay said that doesn't seem possible.
"My answer to those that want to offset the spending is sure, bring me the offsets, I'll be glad to do it. But nobody has been able to come up with any yet," the Texas Republican told reporters at his weekly briefing.
I can think of a lot of bike trails that can be pushed off a while. I believe there is a bridge in Alaska that could wait. Just a couple of things off the top of my head. DeLay is insulting the intelligence of those of us who should be his supporters, and in doing so is inviting attacks from his right. He's been in Washington long enough to know that he probably has more to fear from attacks from the right than from those to his left.

Yes, but are they testing on animals?

Hmm, I wonder if PETA has a position on this:
A British newspaper said that a Chinese cosmetics company was using skin harvested from the corpses of executed convicts to develop beauty products for sale in Europe.

Agents for the firm, which could not be named for legal reasons, have told would-be customers that skin taken from prisoners after they have been shot is being used to develop collagen for lip and wrinkle treatments, the Guardian newspaper said following an undercover investigation.


"However, the Guardian has learned that the company has exported collagen products to the UK in the past. An agent told customers it had also exported to the US and European countries, and that it was trying to develop fillers using tissue from aborted foetuses."

Wednesday, September 14, 2005

No storm in my part of Jefferson County

Storms in Southeastern Wisconsin (much of Wisconsin, really) left thousands without power last night and today, but thankfully the storms split and went around my little corner of the world for a change. As they passed us by, the storms left this eery golden glow in the skies.

Deja Vu

So, do you ever feel like you've written a post on a topic before, and with nearly the same ideas? I get a strong sense of deja vu on posts from time to time. When this occurs, I know I have a couple of choices. I can check back to the archives and see if that's really the case, and then scrap the entire post and just link back to the original, or I can just post what I've written because I know that few will go back and look at the original. I almost always choose the latter.

Live by the pork, die by the pork

Republicans find themselves between a rock and a hard place of their own making. They recently passed a highway bill that was so packed full of fat that it needed a quadruple bypass to get to the President's desk for his signature. This, understandably, pissed off fiscal conservatives such as myself. Now they are faced with the clean up bill for Hurricane Katrina, which congressional leaders are "hoping" will cost less than the highway bill.

Here's the conundrum. Congressional Republicans are already somewhat vulnerable looking going into the 2006 mid-term elections. Having this additional pile of debt for Katrina is not going to help them with their Conservative base. Don't get me wrong, it isn't that Conservatives are opposed to aiding the Gulf region (although some true Federalist types may), but rather that this spending is made worse by the pork that Republican congressional leaders have been rolling around in. So the alternative is to go back and cut some fat that has already been approved. That isn't going to help them with Joe Sixpack. Yeah, old Joe would probably happily hold off on that bike trail a while if it was presented to him as the money being better spent helping people in the Gulf. But that isn't how Democrats will spin it. They'll spin it in a way that will make the Republican in that district look like a boob who can't manage a budget. So they have a choice-they can piss off the Conservative base of the party, or they can piss off the less politically engaged, swingish type voter. Guess who they'll choose?

That's correct, they'll choose the base because they know the conservatives in the base will stick with them longer than Joe Sixpack will. That's reasonable on occasion, but I'm beginning to wonder how long the conservatives will take this from the Republican party. Someday, possibly as soon as November of 2006, Conservatives will be sitting over the lifeless body of the Republican party with the defribrilator paddles in hand and we'll wonder: Is this even worth it? After all, the party lived by the pork, and maybe it should die by it.

Deja Vu

Ever feel like you've written a post on a topic before, and with nearly the same ideas? I get a strong sense of deja vu on posts from time to time. When this occurs, I know I have a couple of choices. I can check back to the archives and see if that's really the case, and then scrap the entire post and just link back to the original, or I can just post what I've written because I know that few will go back and look at the original. I almost always choose the latter.

Yadda yadda yadda...

In the wake of Katrina, the news has gotten somewhat dull again-thankfully. There is little use in discussing the Roberts confirmation (except to note stupid comments like "super-duper precedent"), but it is all just the poli-preenings of group of enormous egos. Roberts is going to be confirmed handily. There is little point in discussing Katrina because it is difficult to discern fact from estimate from fabrication at this moment. And I have no desire to write about Iraq, because I think the distraction from it may help over there, and I'm not ready to play a part in putting it back in the spotlight. So I guess over the next few days, I'll be going to my fall back: Beer. If I don't consume too much, I'll write about it, too.

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

Feingold questions Roberts

The transcript can be found here.

On sports metaphors, Title IX

Ann Althouse this morning discusses John Roberts' use of a baseball analogy in his opening statement. She didn't think much of it:
It says: I come from the world of men. My reference points are men's things. I will speak in a way that will make men feel welcome and at home, and women can come along if they've taken an interest in the same things.
The discussion in the comments over the appropriateness of the analogy did not interest me nearly as much as this thought did: "Does this mean Professor Althouse is not a supporter of Title IX?" I did a quick Yahoo search of "Title IX" and Althouse, and did not come up with any results from her blog in the first 50 results.

Title IX is built in part on the assumption that men and women have an equal interest in sports, and therefore should have an equal number of sports positions to try out for collegiately. If Ann is a supporter of Title IX, I am curious how she balances the above quote with that support. But given that quote, I find it hard to believe she does support Title IX, but call that my little assumption.

(Note, this started as a comment to her post, but turned into this post because it was way off the topic of the thread. I do not expect a resolution to my query. Call it stream of consciousness blogging.)

Monday, September 12, 2005

Susan Ann Catherine Rollins

Susan Rollins, the baby girl born to her brain dead mother, also Susan, passed away. What looked like a little ray of joy amongst a storm of sadness for the family has also been clouded over. My condolences to the family. Rest, little one.

The raw materials of history

OnlyThreeSoFar (hat tip Boots & Sabers) brings us some first hand accounts of what went on in New Orleans during the week after Katrina. Read these accounts, and store them away to memory. First hand accounts, made as soon after the historical event as possible, are the raw materials of history. Major news outlet accounts are good, but prone to error and sensationalization, and yes, bias. We still have a fuzzy picture of what did and did not happen in the Gulf Coast following Katrina. With time, we'll be able to collect these first hand accounts, sort them by their quality (not all first hand accounts are accurate), sift through them and compare them to a timeline and to one another, and then we will finally get a clearer picture of this event. Stuffy and boring though they appear to most Americans, this is why we have historians. Do not make the mistake of thinking we already understand this as a historical event, though. Just reading the first hand accounts linked above leads to as many new questions as those they answer.

Ah, and one more thing. If there is a government investigation of the response to Katrina, I'd ignore the report and go straight to the foot notes. Any investigation will be little more than a game of political CYA.


In the spirit of my earlier post on Che t-shirts, I bring you this link to Che-Mart. Amusing. "Che Guevarra: World's Greatest T-shirt Salesman."

Walker done for season

Javon Walker is done for the year. That splashing noise you hear is fans jumping off the listing USS Green Bay Packers. As for me, I'm just going to sit here with the band. They're playing such lovely, calming music...

Sunday, September 11, 2005

A blog flames out

All bloggers want that link that pushes them into the big time. In fact, a lot of bloggers are addicted to it. There is nothing wrong with that. I know, I was there once. I've had a couple of nice links since I started, and the traffic they produced was addictive. Making it to the big time (which this blog has not done yet) is not about that fleeting traffic from a big link, though. It is about quality over time.

I present to you example A, Musings of a Fat Kid. Musings had a meteoric rise. First, take a look at Musing's traffic from the past year, and notice that in February they had well over 25,000 visitors. Much of that came from an unholy triumvirate of links on the same day from Instapundit, The Corner, and Michelle Malkin. It was deserved. I loved Musings of a Fat Kid. But Musings was a flash in the pan. It had one month, nay, one week of a bright spotlight. By March, they were already back down to regular traffic levels. Now, Musings is rarely updated, and their traffic is below that of most first year blogs.

So what is the moral of this story? Links are good, but you need to build up a regular stable of visitors that don't come to you via someone else's site. A link brings a nice amount of one time traffic, but unless you convert them into fans of your site, and make your site a destination for them, it is a very short term gain. Links are important but perhaps over valued. It still comes down to developing your own regular readership. That's a lesson that too many bloggers over look.

4 years

It was 4 years ago today that the world of all Americans was flipped on its head. My time stamp for this post represents 4 years from the moment I found out about the attacks on 9/11. A lot has happened in 4 years, a lot that we may not have believed possible on day 4 years ago. We went into Afghanistan with a relatively small force and, along with allies in the Northern Alliance, removed the Taliban from power. We have removed terror sympathizer and terrorizer of the entire Middle East, Saddam Hussein, from power. We have removed troops from Saudi Arabia. We have seen small ground swells of Democratization across the globe. We've watched our former nemesis Libya decide that its lot is not best cast with that of terrorists. But we still are no where near completed with the job.

On December 7, 1945, the nation was able to look back with relief on a job well done. In four years the United States, with the help of our allies, had completed a rollback of the war machines of Germany, Japan, and Italy. The task in World War II was monumental, but in many ways, it was straight forward. The War on Terror is a complex war that is difficult for people to understand, with enemies that do not fight under a unified flag and common uniforms. It is war that is going to take a long time to win, a war that we still need to realize that we cannot afford to lose. Most Americans take for granted that the United States will always exist, but they shouldn't. We are still a young experiment in terms of global history. We've done an excellent job of turning back centralized threats to our existance over the years, but we've never faced a decentralized, difficult to grasp threat from within and without like Islamic terror. And make no mistake about; Islamic terrorists do not seek our understanding, respect, and kindness-that's just their propaganda. They seek our destruction and their conquest over our government, our land, and our freedoms. We've not yet stopped them.

Today, hug your loved ones, and be thankful you still have them. Reflect on the day. Look at the pictures from four years ago. Remember.

Saturday, September 10, 2005

Patently offensive

Symbols have power. And sometimes a symbol that is by itself not offensive can be made patently offensive if placed in the wrong context. And such is the case with the red crescent that is a major component of the Flight 93 Memorial in Pennsylvania.

This is the winning design, rotated approximately 155 degrees. Notice the clear red crescent. And this may be a coincidence (given most North American Muslims pray to the NE), but Mecca is approximately in the "North" position here. In otherwords, the crescent would be correctly aligned if you were looking towards Mecca with the memorial between you and Mecca. It is easier to notice with the memorial in proper North-South alignment.

It doesn't matter if this (the alignment) was intentional or not, what does matter is that the red crescent is a very important symbol to the people that caused the deaths of those on Flight 93. To make that symbol the central aspect of a memorial to those killed is to spit on the ground they died on.

Zombie has contact information for the individuals who can still change this. If you feel this is innapropriate as I do, I encourage you to use that contact info to register your disapproval.

Image credits to Zombie as well.

Update 2
Perhaps this will get a redesign. Best to keep an eye on it, anyway.

Friday, September 09, 2005

Federal monies unspent? Pshaw

PoliPundit has 8 Katrina predictions from a National Guardsman who was active on the ground in New Orleans. I agree with his first 7 predictions. Number 8 I find tough to believe, though:
8. The funds allocated by Congress will not be completely used.
Doubtful. Even if the disaster costs less than what Congress has set aside, the money will be spent completely. I could take the opportunity to poke at NO & LA's historic corruption, but that would be unfair, because every state and city would find a way to spend every last penny that came to them. Which is why I can't fault James Sensenbrenner for voting no because he wanted more controls placed on the funds.

Refugees? No. Evacuees? No. Skiddadlers? Yes!

Belle takes a look at what exactly we should be calling those leaving the Katrina disaster zone for safety elsewhere. In her post, she reprints the defintitions and the thesaurus entries for refugee, evacuate, and victim, and I'm so glad she did. The thesaurus entry for evacuate gives us the perfect word we should use to refer to these individuals: Skidaddlers (or skedaddler).

I would love to see the headline "Thousands of Katrina skidaddlers head for better environs". I would pay to see Brain Williams lead the NBC Nightly News by saying, "Louisiana skidaddlers today received good news with the disbursment of $2000 debit cards." And how offensive can skidaddler be? Who could offended by that? Could Jesse Jackson stand in front of the T.V. cameras and say, "The minorities they do paddle, when the media says skidaddle"? I don't think so.


Today, just for you, my favorite readers, I have an embarrassing story about me. I need to set the stage first, though. I take a certain pride in my gracefullness and athletic ability. Check that, not a certain pride, but an extreme pride. I do not fall down, period. Not me. But I do make myself look like a jack ass avoiding falls.

Yesterday I was walking down an enclosed but public stairway. When I walk alone, I usually do so deep in thought, and not always about deep things. Today, for existence, as I walked down the stairs, I was thinking about how I would land if I ever had to vault down those stairs. Ahh, the power of suggestion. As I reached the bottom of the stairs, I put out my right foot and then...nothing. I had missed the final two steps. The falling sensation clued me into the fact that something was very wrong. I instantly became aware that if I did not do something quick, I was going to be eating the hard floor. So I twisted my body and extended my right leg out in splits fashion so I could land in a stable manner. But when my foot hit, my ankle started to roll, and in my haste to avoid breaking it, I shifted my body straight again. That did the trick, but then I saw something shoot by me out of the corner of my left eye. It was my left leg. In my efforts to avoid the fall, I had forgotten several rules of physics, and when I had straightened my body out, it caused that left leg-still on the third stair-to shoot by me like it was a surface to air missile.

As my left leg rocketed past my ear, I realized I had a new problem. My moment was carrying me straight toward a concrete wall. In a pure instinct move, my unhappy right leg carried forward the second the left hit the ground and then it dug in. I then stopped my momentum like a gymnast who had just stuck his landing-seriously, I think my arms even went up in the air like I was Nadia Comaneci at the 1976 Olympics. Relief washed over me, and then panic stabbed me in the heart. I WAS IN A PUBLIC STAIRWAY. I quickly looked around to see if anyone saw me. Fortunately, nobody did. So I dusted off, straightened my shirt, and strutted through the door like I was the King of England and nothing had happened. But if you see a security video on the internet of a goofy guy falling down three stairs and then pretending to be a gymnast, yeah, that's me.

Why do I tell you all of this embarrassment? Well, my pride wants me to say it is because I want to show everyone my humanity. But that would be bull shit. It's because I'm afraid to go to sleep. I know I'm going to wake up to the sound of every vertebrae in my spine locking up like the breaks on an 18 wheeler. Please, Lord, don't let me fall asleep.

Jiblog salutes Ken Herrera

620 AM WTMJ's Charlie Sykes brings us this story about the channel's morning host Ken Herrera. Herrera apparently received one of those unhinged, conspiracy theory emails that claims that the Pentagon was actually hit by a missile. Sykes Writes brings us Herrera's response. I have got to give it to him, it takes a big pair of brass ones to send an email like Herrera's in today's corporate climate, provided this came to him via his work email. I've received them myself, and while I am always tempted to reply, I have decided every time that discretion is the better part of valor. So today I virtually tip my hat to Ken Herrera for saying what needed to be said.

While I think his response (and Charlie's publication of it) will probably mean Herrera will no longer receive these loony emails, if it doesn't, and it was an internal email, I have one word of advice for him. If he has an office or a cubicle, it helps to put up a picture of a well known Republican that conspiracy theorists hate. Ronald Reagan, George W. Bush, Dick Cheney, and Karl Rove all work nicely. The presence of the picture frightens them, and it sends a clear message without saying a word. Worked for me. In fact, with the Roberts battle coming up, I may change to a Clarence Thomas picture.

Childish, churlishness, and pettiness

The blame game has been going on over Hurricane Katrina since last Tuesday. To a limited extent, I don't think that is such a bad thing, although tossing blame so soon after a disaster risks unecessarily high emotions to play a part, and the focus to be taken off the task at hand-search, rescue, aid, and recovery. But even I am fatigued by it all. The title of this post, Childishness, churlishness, and pettiness reflects much of what is going on right now. There is very little substantive debate going on, and a whole lot of political imaturity and CYA. Of all the American natural disasters that I can remember in my 29 years, this one is the worst, and so too is the behavior of an awful lot of people.

Thursday, September 08, 2005

Hunter S. Thompson

Hunter S. Thompson was as unusual in death as he was in life. Rolling Stone will reportedly publish his suicide note, entitled "Football Season is Over."

Jib Wayne

That's what you can call me from now on, pardners. I fell for the latest "who are you" meme, this one being "What classic leading man are you?" I was John Wayne. I'm not so sure that I agree, but it fits nicely with my tagline.

Want to play? Follow this link to see which classic leading man or lady you are. HT to Mary Eileen.

Wednesday, September 07, 2005

No mas Lechner! No mas!

Ugh. With the beginning of a new school year, we have the mandatory Johnny Lechner story out of UW Whitewater. Enough already. It is almost getting embarassing. Lechner is something of a local laughing stock, and becomes more so as his "legend" grows. Sure, he may get a nice pay day and an extended 15 minutes of fame out of this, but the fall is going to be hard. The money will be gone in record time, and with it the fame. And I say that with confidence. What kind of a fool buys a limo to take to class with what could be his nest egg? Wait, I think I have the answer to that. A 12th year senior does.

No decency for journalism

As the Iraq War rolled on, journalists raised a small stink about the Pentagon's refusal to let them photograph flag draped coffins that were returning to the United States. Maybe, maybe I could be convinced that there is a journalistic point in doing so. But when it comes to this, I cannot be persuaded:
FEMA, which is leading the rescue efforts, rejected requests from journalists to accompany rescue boats as they went out to search for storm victims, Reuters reported.

A FEMA spokeswoman told the wire service that space was needed on the rescue boats and assured Reuters that "the recovery of the victims is being treated with dignity and the utmost respect."

"We have requested that no photographs of the deceased be made by the media," the spokeswoman told Reuters via e-mail.

On Wednesday, journalist groups protested the move.

"It's impossible for me to imagine how you report a story whose subject is death without allowing the public to see images of the subject of the story," Larry Siems of the PEN American Center told Reuters.

Rebecca Daugherty of the Reporters Committee for Freedom of the Press said: "The notion that, when there's very little information from FEMA, that they would even spend the time to be concerned about whether the reporting effort is up to its standards of taste is simply mind-boggling. You cannot report on the disaster and give the public a realistic idea of how horrible it is if you don't see that there are bodies as well."
Americans have a pretty good idea how horrible this disaster is. Pictures of the dead is one one of the most horrific things I can imagine for the survivors. Tell me this. If you just went through hell and had family members and friends still missing, would you want to learn of their fate by seeing their dead, bloated body on the front page of the New York Times or as the lead in for ABC Nightly News? Is it necessary to traumatize people further? The answer to the second question is no, not for a good journalist. This is nothing more than a media attempt to fire political volleys, decency be damned. All I can see when I think of this story is the media as vulture feeding on the death in New Orleans.

Katrina blame game not to be settled any time soon

Every few generations, the political boundary lines in the United States shift. The most recent shift began in the 1950's and 1960's as the conservative movement gained steam and redefined the Republican and Democratic parties. The two major political philosophies that rule the roost today are the Liberal and Conservative philosphies. When looking at each in the big picture, a few generalizations can be made. Generally speaking, Liberals believe that there are many things that people cannot do for themselves, which leads to their belief in strong central government involvement in people's lives. Conservatives, on the other hand (again, generally speaking), believe that choices, governmental decisions, and responsibility should be on the most local level possible. And given those generalities, it is easy to see the fault lines between Liberals and Conservatives on Hurricane Katrina. From the Liberal point of view, it was the Federal Government's responsibility to make sure that all was right for everyone, not that of the locals. From the Conservative point of view, the Feds have a role, but the initial response to disaster is the responsibility of the local and state governments. So until the political boundaries shift again one day, most scholarship on Katrina will fall into one camp or the other, and therefore nothing will be resolved.

Interestingly, one thing that may get over looked is the impact of political philosophies on the Katrina aftermath. If their had been Conservative/Republican government in Louisiana and Democratic leadership at the Federal level, this may have never been an issue. The conservatives at the local level would have worked locally to take care of their constituents until Federal relief could arrive. In the current situation, the state and local governments in Louisiana looked immediately to the Feds for help, assuming that the Feds could, would, and should make everything right, without taking control of the situation on the ground themselves. On the flip side, the Federal Government looked to Louisiana to take care of itself as Mississippi has tried to do while the Federal relief effort kicked into gear. The two political philosphies clashed and created a vacuum in leadership during the early days of the crisis. The Feds looked to the local Louisiana governments to take care of things in the short term, and the local Louisiana governments abdicated responsibility with the expectation that the Feds would make everything a-okay, right away. If there is a big lesson to be learned, it is probably that the philosphical differences between the local, state, and Federal governments led to everyone having different expectations of the other, and in the end, a certain paralysis setting in.

The charms of Delilah Cat

My family was down this weekend for their annual pilgrimage to Jib Manor (Aside: I don't know why I bother with this Jib thing anymore-my real name is being used by anyone and everyone now, much to my chagrine). As is typical, my mother desperately tried to make friends with Delilah Cat. Delilah is a unique personality. She hates all forms of life except her own and the two that feed her-Mrs. Jib and myself. This year my Mom upped the ante. She bought Delilah toys. In true form, Delilah snubbed my mom's purchases, which I know pained my mom. But the cat could not hold out forever. She is going crazy over the toys now that it is just herself and I in the house.

Score one for mom in absentia.


This is a post that is actually 2 days over due. With the Labor Day weekend and a visit from family on the docket, I hope my lovely bride will understand-in fact, I know she will, because the date slipped by her as well.

10 years ago, on September 4, 1995, the lovely Mrs. Jib and I met for the first time. It was not a storybook meeting. I was a sophomore, full of myself, if for no other reason than I wasn't a freshman anymore. She was a freshman, brand new to college and eager to get started. I'll spare the details because I know she isn't fond of our personal stories being played out on the internet, but sufficeth to say we weren't terribly fond of one another after that first meeting. I guess it just goes to show that first impressions aren't always as important as they are made out to be. A little over two months later we were dating, and the rest is history.

As I think back, the ten years have flashed by in the blink of an eye. We are boring folk, so it is safe to say that while a lot hasn't happened in thattime, they have been the best ten years of my life.

Tuesday, September 06, 2005

Innocence lost

I thought I was a pretty worldly person, wise in the ways of life. Then I read this and had the last vestiges of my innocence forcibly ripped away from me as I lay crying in the fetal position. (Caution: You may want to rethink clicking that link if you have not had children yet.)

Louisiana Governor Blanco

There is plenty of blame to go around for the aftermath of Katrina in Louisiana. From local government to state government to the Federal government, mistakes were made. My gut feeling is that LA Governor Blanco is the hinge point that is (deservedly) going to receive a lot of the blame when historians have the chance to sort this all out down the road. Mayor Nagin and his city government made mistakes and cracked, but they cracked in part because the next level of leadership, the state government, failed miserably. In every interview I saw of Blanco last week, she seemed ill informed and her leadership seemed non-existant. The standard for local and state leadership during a disaster was set by New York after 9-11. Pataki and Giuliani led their people and did what needed to be done quickly. Since the immediate reaction to disaster is led on local and state levels, Louisiana needed to to provide leadership to the situation. It did not. History will compare Mississippi and Louisiana and find Louisiana badly lacking in leadership. And I really wish I could sit and make this post with out it being a stark comparison of Republican and Democratic leadership, but it is what it is. If it is any consolation to my Democratic readers, I think Louisiana is such a mess that it wouldn't have mattered if it were Democrats or Republicans in leadership positions in that state. Either way, we'd still have the same problems.

Chief Justice nominee John Roberts

I've been a little squeamish on the Roberts nomination from the get go. My impression is that Roberts has revolved his life around the goal of becoming a Supreme Court justice, and he has made sure that he had a record to allow himself to play both sides of the fence. People like that make me nervous, and I'm very nervous now. The Bush administration is nominating for Chief Justice a man that could be the next Rehnquist or the next Souter. If he becomes some sort of Rehnquist as Chief Justice, then the Bush administration hits a home run. If he is the next Souter, then they laid a huge egg with this nomination. And sadly, I am very distrustful of the judgement of any Bush when it comes to Supreme Court nominations.

Young hero

I'm loathe to add to the publicity on this story, because I think it will be best for the boy if he not get the celebrity treatment, but this 6 year old is a hero:
In the chaos that was Causeway Boulevard, this group of refugees stood out: a 6-year-old boy walking down the road, holding a 5-month-old, surrounded by five toddlers who followed him around as if he were their leader.

They were holding hands. Three of the children were about 2 years old, and one was wearing only diapers. A 3-year-old girl, who wore colorful barrettes on the ends of her braids, had her 14-month-old brother in tow. The 6-year-old spoke for all of them, and he told rescuers his name was Deamonte Love.
That is a young boy we should all be proud of. It opens up a whole new can of questions, though. Like, where are the parents of these children? Hopefully all of their parents are alive. But it is difficult to fathom how a parent could allow themselves to be seperated from their children in a situation like this. A couple of posts below this one, I established my position that you take care of your pets in a disaster but you don't risk your life for them. When it comes to your children, their life should come before everything else, and allowing yourself to be seperated from them is unfathomable. Luckily for these kids, they had Deamonte.

New Orleans hurricane plan, reproduced

I am going to reproduce the New Orleans hurricane plan in it's entirety here for two reasons. The first is that these documents have a tendency to "disappear" from the web when it is politically convenient. Secondly, I want to preserve this document, which, as a public plan, I can legally reproduce. For the original, you can go here. Below is the text as it appeared at 1 am on 9/6/2005.



City of New Orleans Comprehensive Emergency Management Plan



Training and education on Disaster Preparedness are essential to local government and non?government disaster agencies, in order to mitigate the loss of life and property in the event of a peacetime emergency. An understanding of emergency operations, plus recurring education and training in emergency response and disaster operations, is the basis of response effectiveness. Individuals with assigned tasks must receive preparatory training to maximize operations. The goal of emergency preparedness training is the preparation of individuals and organizations for effective and coordinated response to emergencies.

Likewise, increasing the public's awareness of the various hazards which may threaten them, and the available methods of protection is the essence of emergency preparedness. In addition, during periods of emergency and disaster it will be necessary for the citizenry to be informed and educated concerning any action that may be required of them to save lives and property. A mechanism must be in place to inform the public as to particulars of evacuation, health care, shelter, transportation and all other directions of which they should be informed.


Under the direction of the Mayor, the Office of Emergency Preparedness will coordinate activities in accordance with the Comprehensive Emergency Management Plan to assure the coordination of training programs for all planning, support, and response agencies. Departments, authorities, agencies, municipalities, and all private response organizations bear the responsibility of ensuring their personnel are sufficiently trained.

The Office of Emergency Preparedness will coordinate training provided by the Louisiana Office of Emergency Preparedness and the Federal Emergency Management Agency. Schedules of state emergency management training will be provided to all appropriate agencies. Applications for LOEP/FEMA courses will be submitted to the Director, Office of Emergency Preparedness for approval and submittal to LOEP.


A. Director, Office of Emergency Preparedness

1. Coordination of all training activities of the various services of the Emergency Preparedness organization so as to obtain the highest degree of effectiveness in individual training, team or unit training, collective training, combined training and mock or practice emergency preparedness alerts.

The Director of the Office of Emergency Preparedness shall endeavor to take full advantage of courses offered by the Louisiana Office of Emergency Preparedness (LOEP), the Federal Emergency Management Agency (FEMA), the Louisiana Emergency Preparedness Association (LEPA) and other agencies, as well as conferences, seminars and workshops that may from time to time be available, most notably state hurricane conferences and workshops and the National Hurricane Conference. The Director will also establish procedures for the notification of available training opportunities to other City agencies and other governmental and private emergency response organizations. Specific duties to coordinate and monitor available training and educational opportunities shall be an operational task of the Administrative and Training Officer (ATO) of the Office of Emergency Preparedness. The ATO shall maintain close communication with the State Training Officer of the LOEP as to the availability of training opportunities, coordinate classes for local personnel and maintain tracking of courses taken, develop methods of sharing to information with other emergency management personnel within the jurisdiction, as well as arrange training and educational opportunities for non?emergency management personnel, particularly local elected and appointed officials. The ATO, conducts on an annual basis, training and information sharing workshops with all EOC representatives from various agencies. These workshops are conducted at the Emergency Support Function (ESF) level. Workshops include the review of existing EOC/ESF standard operating procedures, review of organization changes that affects EOC or field disaster response operations, updates key personnel lists and identifies training needs of new personnel, and orientation to improvements or changes to EOC/ESF resources or materials. From time to time, the ATO may undertake more intensive work sessions with elements of the emergency response organizations in order to enhance unified disaster planning.

2. Develops and conducts disaster exercises.

The Director of the Office of Emergency Preparedness shall continue to exercise all levels of the City government in emergency preparedness and response operations. Annually, a minimum of one full?scale functional exercise that utilizes all levels of City government shall be conducted. This functional exercise shall include the Mayor, elected and appointed officials, independent authorities, and such non?governmental agencies as shall be determined appropriate.

The Director of the Office of Emergency Preparedness shall participate in the development and execution of annual Mass Casualty Incidents. This participation may include scenario development, site selection, and recruitment of resources and personnel.

The Director of the Office of Emergency Preparedness shall continue to provide assistance to private industry, non?profit organizations, and community organizations through the offering of training, joint drills and exercises, response and recovery plan development, and information sharing. Included in this effort are the following organizations:

* Association of Contingency Planners (ACP)
* New Orleans Tourist and Information Bureau
* New Orleans Hospital Association

The Director shall also develop evaluation procedures either independently or in conjunction with other participants, in order to evaluate exercises and to incorporate necessary changes into the disaster response organization.

3. Coordinates, facilitates and encourages other elements of city government in emergency preparedness and response planning efforts.

The Director shall continue ongoing programs of directing and facilitating City agencies in the improvement of service providing during disasters through the development of emergency response self?assessments, long?term action plans, agency contingency plans, ESF standard operating procedures, and other mechanisms that may be identified.

The City of New Orleans requires every agency of the City government to perform emergency response self?assessments of their abilities to continue to provide essential services during and following a major emergency or disaster. The City further requires that corresponding long?term action plans to address identified short?comings be developed by each agency of the City and submitted to the Office of Emergency Preparedness for review and inclusion in coordinated action activities.

4. Participates in state level exercises.

Annually, in conjunction with the Louisiana Statewide Hurricane Exercise, the Office of Emergency Preparedness will sponsor and coordinate a Parish wide exercise of the local government's emergency management organization. To enhance the State's exercise, the OEP Director shall develop scenarios based upon expected local impacts of the exercise storm. If local impacts from the exercise storm are deemed less than needed to exercise the full emergency response organization, than the OEP may independently develop scenarios that would allow for the exercise of all city/parish resources.

5. Coordinates disaster preparedness training activities with others in such areas as shelter operations, transportation, hospitals and nursing homes, hurricane evacuation and recovery, etc. The OEP shall work in conjunction with all elements of the disaster response organization to enhance emergency response training. Activities shall include identification of School Board and Dept. Of Health staffs to be trained in shelter management operations, providing educational workshops and seminars to public and private entities, develop and direct committees assembled to address critical issues of emergency response, develop specialized informational brochures directed at select elements of the community, and other activities as may be identified.

B. City Departments, Constitutional Authorities, and All Emergency Response Agencies.

1. Ensure personnel are trained in appropriate plans and standard operating procedures (SOP's) for disaster operations.

The City of New Orleans requires that every City/Parish agency prepare an Agency Disaster Report assessing their ability to respond to any disaster or emergency that may either affect their agency or which may call upon that agency to perform response or relief efforts. Each agency, as part of the assessment process , is required to address numerous issues, including the disaster role of the agency, the validity of existing plans and procedures, the training of employees in their disaster response roles, family preparedness, and emergency use and acquisition of resources.

Once the self?assessment is completed, each agency is then required to develop and implement, with the assistance of the Office of Emergency Preparedness, a Long Term Action Plan which will enhance their emergency preparedness and disaster response.

2. Attend, or provide senior staff as representatives to disaster training exercises.

The City of New Orleans, in order to develop a citywide awareness of disaster response functions, requires that each agency designate an Emergency Coordinating Officer (ECO). The ECO is responsible for the preparing and maintaining of emergency preparedness and disaster response plans and procedures for their agency. Part of this responsibility includes participation in disaster training exercises and drills as may be available.

C. OEP Shelter Coordinator

1. Provides shelter management training program to designated shelter managers and disaster services personnel.

2. Maintain trained volunteer cadre for disaster response in areas of mass feeding, damage assessment, etc.

3. Participate in disaster exercises when requested.

4. Develop recruitment programs that will provide the additional manpower required to respond to a major emergency such as a hurricane.

D. Chief Administrative Officer

1. Ensure training programs are conducted for municipal personnel with disaster responsibilities.

2. Ensure participation of key emergency response personnel in City disaster exercises.

3. Conduct local emergency exercises.

E. Orleans Parish School Board.

1. Ensure identification and training of shelter personnel for public shelters utilizing public school locations.

2. Conduct disaster education programs and staff training.

F. Emergency Medical Service

1. Conduct annual mass casualty exercise in order to test response capabilities of emergency response agencies and medical facilities.

2. Conduct oral critique and written after?action reports for the mass casualty exercises.


The City of New Orleans government will conduct at least one functional or full scale training exercise annually, which will test the response capabilities of all functions of city government, as well as the private organizations, Parish school system and other agencies required to respond to disasters.

These tests will be conducted by the Director of the Office of Emergency Preparedness and will be reviewed and assessed as to readiness by participants. Qualified observers may assist Emergency Preparedness personnel in evaluating the drills.

Private organizations, such as nursing homes, will be assisted by Emergency Preparedness personnel in conducting disaster drills as requested, and when required by State Law.

On a rotating basis in accordance with the schedule developed with the State Division of Emergency Management, the City shall conduct natural hazard, national security and technological exercises.

The Office of Emergency Preparedness shall conduct hurricane briefings and training sessions with the Mayor and his staff, Department Heads, municipal officials and all other governmental and private emergency response agencies.

On request, the Office of Emergency Preparedness shall brief elected officials on emergency management activities and hurricane preparedness.

The Office of Emergency Preparedness shall conduct hurricane and emergency management seminars when requested.

The Office of Emergency Preparedness shall participate in regional emergency preparedness planning sessions with other parishes and municipalities.



One of the principal goals of the Office of Emergency Preparedness is the education of residents and visitors towards the natural and manmade hazards that do or may threaten our community. Many of the emergency preparedness and management functions directed at informing the public of events or rapidly developing situations is detailed in ESF?14, Public Information.


The coordination of public information activities is a shared responsibility of the Office of Emergency Preparedness and the Office of Communications. Public information procedures are divided into three phases: continuing education, pre?disaster preparation, and post?disaster recovery. Continuing education is intended to increase awareness of disaster potential, improve education on ways to protect life and property, and expand information on the availability of assistance and services. Pre?disaster preparation briefs the public on imminent danger, and provides details about evacuation and sheltering procedures. During the post?disaster phase, the public is informed on such matters as disaster assistance, health precautions, long term sheltering, and other important issues involving the community's recovery operations.

Specific tasks include the development and delivery of pre?disaster information and education programs, the coordination of all City Public Information Officers, the initiation of the proper news releases, announcements, etc., and the making of arrangements for printing adequate literature to facilitate the goal of educating and informing the public. The Office of Emergency Preparedness and Office of Communications shall also devise a mechanism whereby the largest possible segment of the population can be sufficiently educated in disaster events to minimize panic and misunderstanding, including elderly and special needs population.


A. Office of Emergency Preparedness

1. The preparation and dissemination of a general public education program in order to attain high public morale, minimize fear and panic and obtain full individual participation in Emergency Preparedness activities and maximum public support of the emergency management plan.

Public education is the focus of the activities of the OEP Administration and Training Officer (ATO). Although all members of the OEP staff participate in public education, it is primarily the ATO who is responsible for the development of education programs. The ATO shall either utilize materials prepared by other agencies such as the Louisiana Office of Emergency Preparedness, and the Federal Emergency Management Agency (FEMA), or shall develop materials directed at the specific needs or concerns of our local population.

The ATO participates with other organizations in the presentation of disaster preparedness materials and programs. Such programs include corporate emergency preparedness/disaster presentations, presentations to civic and professional organizations, annual hurricane awareness seminars, and special event presentations.

The ATO is the OEP staff member who coordinates and facilitates required family preparedness seminars for City government employees. They are designed to educate employees to their families' needs in anticipation that the employee will not be available to assist in family disaster preparedness and response activities, and to educate families whose City employee spouse, parent, or guardian may not be available for an extended time following a disaster. The seminars discuss potential hazards to the City, evacuation options, job responsibilities, and other subjects.

2. To conduct public information programs providing regular reports to the public on Emergency Preparedness activities. The public information programs include news features on television and radio. Public forums, joint presentations, and speaking engagements will also be conducted.

3. Annually, assist business and media with publication of disaster preparedness and evacuation information.

4. In times of disaster, advise the public of developments and procedures for locating emergency services. During a disaster, the OEP directs calls to the Office of Public Advocacy. Public Advocacy provides current and accurate information to the public.

5. Develop procedures and mechanisms for the notification of persons who can not rely on traditional media sources.

The OEP works closely with the Human Relations Commission to identify and explore the feasibility of alternative notification methods, including new technology designed to assist the hearing and sight impaired.

Local television stations can also use header and footer scrolls across their programming in order to notify the hearing impaired of emergency situations.

The OEP works with the home health care industry to provide emergency preparedness information and educational materials. The EOC also, through ESF?8, Health and Medical, provides status reports of approaching tropical storms to home health providers to assist them in preparing their clients for severe weather.

6. The OEP shall maintain a working relation with the electronic media for the prompt dissemination of emergency related information.

In times of concern for developing events, or actual emergency, local media organizations will participate in the dissemination of public emergency information. Major local television stations will be present in the EOC upon clearance from the Office of Communications, and provide information from the EOC.

During an emergency, the OEP will utilize Cox Cable to facilitate information dissemination. 8. Following a major disaster such as a hurricane, coordinate with State and Federal agencies on news releases and other information being made available to the public. Areas within ESF?14 are designated for State and Federal agencies, where they will be provided work space in close proximity to media briefing and work areas. They will be joined by City public information officers (PIOs) who are trained in EOC public information procedures (See ESF?14, Public Information).

9. Develop procedures and mechanisms to provide proper identification for key response and recovery personnel, for governmental, private relief, and corporate entities.

10. Develop procedures for public identification of shelters, critical recovery services and centers prior to and immediately following a major disaster when all normal public information systems may be inoperable.

The OEP will, via ESF?6, Mass Care, and ESF?14, Public Information, issue constantly updated information on available shelters prior to and during disaster operations, and will utilize extraordinary means when called upon following a disaster to provide updated information.

11. The OEP shall develop procedures for providing information to transient and homeless populations through the procedures as outlined in the Severe Weather Shelter Program.

B. Office of Communications

1. Develop adequate educational materials for dissemination to the public prior to the disaster.

2. Coordinate and develop all news releases to be delivered by elected officials, and consult with other city departments and agencies in development of appropriate bulletins affecting their activities in which the public must be informed.

3. Literature in the form of pamphlets, flyers, circulars, etc., will be made available for public distribution. The literature will cover all aspects of emergency and disaster response.

4. Develop educational and informational literature that will be disseminated to the public concerning disasters. Information from private relief agencies will be included.

5. Prepare and disseminate information to tourists and transient populations as to conditions and best actions to take, time permitting.

6. City officials will be made aware of procedures to be followed in disseminating material and information to the public to avoid confusion.

7. In the event of a major emergency, activate and man the ESF?14, Public Information, and its media?center within the Emergency Operations Center, and operate it under protocols to be established in conjunction with the Mayor's Office and the Office of Emergency Preparedness.

8. Prior to hurricane season, assist in the establishment of ESF?14 procedures and operational guidelines, and conduct media orientations to EOC facilities and procedures.

9. Assist the Office of Public Advocacy in operating EOC Citizen Information Center, and for the coordination of information to be given out and in following up reports received by this hotline.

10. Provide technical assistance in developing public service announcements that can be prepared before hurricane season for later broadcast, when circumstances may not allow adequate preparation time.

Public service announcements are developed jointly between the OEP and Office of Communications. Prior to each hurricane season, the representatives of the OEP shall meet with the Office of Communications to evaluate the need for the development of public service announcements that can be made and stored until needed. Although such "canned" announcements may be developed, live announcements from the EOC shall remain the preferred method. Scripts that reflect numerous contingencies are developed and on file within the OEP, and allow for the editing of information for specific events.

11. Encourage local television and radio stations in development of special programs on hurricanes and other possible disasters.

C. Other Departments and Agencies

1. Other departments/divisions of the City will coordinate efforts with the OEP in the development of educational tools to be distributed to the public.

2. Other agencies will assure that their personnel are aware of procedures for disseminating information during an emergency or during the recovery from a disaster, and that these procedures include not giving out information that has not been cleared by the Emergency Operations Center.



City of New Orleans Comprehensive Emergency Management Plan.



Evacuation planning and actual implementation has to be based upon certain assumptions. It must be understood that the need to evacuate elements of the population can occur at any time, events resulting in evacuations occur with various amounts of lead time and every evacuation will be unique and offer unexpected challenges to those conducting the evacuation. Evacuations in response to hazardous material spills or sudden severe weather are provided with little or no warning, and often have to be accomplished after the fact, and in a disaster response environment. Throughout the Parish persons with special needs, require special consideration regarding notification, transportation, and sheltering. Resources of equipment, facilities and personnel are more difficult to locate and coordinate when an evacuation is required during late night or early morning hours. If possible, advance warning should be given so an evacuation can be coordinated. Adequate provisions should be maintained at all times in order to conduct a warning or alert of an area.

Certain hazards, such as a hurricane, provide some lead time for coordinating an evacuation. However, this can not be considered a certainty. Plus, the sheer size of an evacuation in response to an approaching hurricane creates the need for the use of community-wide warning resources, which cannot be limited to our City's geographical boundaries. Evacuation of major portions of our population, either in response to localized or citywide disasters, can only be accomplished if the citizens and visitors are kept informed of approaching threats on a timely schedule, and if they are notified of the need to evacuate in a timely and organized manner. If an evacuation order is issued without the mechanisms needed to disseminate the information to the affected persons, then we face the possibility of having large numbers of people either stranded and left to the mercy of a storm, or left in an area impacted by toxic materials.

In this day of high-speed communication and wide-spread availability of information, mechanisms do exist to transmit emergency related information to the vast majority of the community. For our most serious threat, hurricanes, information from the National Hurricane Center in Miami and our local office of the National Weather Service, can reach the general population through local governments and mass media outlets. It is the responsibility of the Office of Emergency Preparedness to guarantee that not only is the public alerted, but that other emergency response organizations and personnel are alert and in position to meet the real or potential threat.

Warning for an emergency requires notification at two levels: notification of public officials and response organizations and the warning of the general public. The mechanisms chosen to accomplish these critical events must be rapid in execution and comprehensive in application. This annex outlines the procedures which will be implemented for notifying the emergency response network of its activation, and of informing the general public of the potential or actual occurrence of life threatening events and hazards.

The extent and methods of warnings issued will be determined by the Director of the Office of Emergency Preparedness, and are based upon the geographic area impacted. When events necessitate the immediate evacuation of threatened individuals, these decisions may be made by the on scene Incident Commander. Decisions affecting larger geographic areas will be made by the Director of the Office of Emergency Preparedness in conjunction with the Superintendent of Fire and Superintendent of Police.

General evacuations that may result from an approaching hurricane will be ordered by the Mayor of the City, upon the recommendation of the Director of the Office of Emergency Preparedness. The area affected by the warning may range from blocks and portions of neighborhoods, to the entire city.


The Office of Emergency Preparedness has the overall responsibility for reception and dissemination of warning information through the city.

If the EOC is rendered unusable, the City of New Orleans Mobile Command Center can be utilized to serve as a temporary Emergency Operations Center. Warnings of potential or actual emergencies can be received at the Parish Warning Point from the following sources:

1. National Weather Service (NWS) maintains its office in Slidell, LA. The NWS forecasts weather conditions and originates severe weather bulletins concerning the area. This information is received at the OEP via weather teletype, NOAA radio, and telephone.

2. Emergency Alert System - Replacing the former Emergency Broadcast System (EBS), the EAS can be used by numerous agencies not only to warn the public, but to receive information from other emergency warning and response organizations.

A. Types of Warnings

1. Severe Weather: Severe Weather warnings are issued by the National Weather Service when severe thunderstorms are expected to affect an area producing winds in excess of 57 mph, or hail 3/4-inch or greater.

2. Tornado Watches and Warnings: Tornado Watches and Warnings are issued by the National Weather Service when conditions are favorable for tornadoes to develop or one has been sighted/reported respectively.

3. Marine Advisories: Marine Advisories are issued on a regular basis by the National Weather Service. Those related to tropical weather systems are issued every 6 hours to report the location and strength of a tropical depression, tropical storm or hurricane. In addition to this information, the Marine Advisory provides predicted strength and forecast positions of the storm at 12, 24, 36, 48 and 72 hours.

4. Tropical Storm/Hurricane Watches and Warnings: Tropical Storm/Hurricane Watches and Warnings are issued as part of the Marine Advisory when a storm may, or is expected to affect a land mass. A Watch is generally issued when a storm might affect an area within 36 hours, while a Warning is issued when a storm is expected to affect an area within 24 hours. Since Hurricanes contain both hurricane force winds (74 mph or greater) and Tropical Storm force winds (40-74 mph), both may be established for a coastal area. The Hurricane Watch/Warning will be issued for the area where the hurricane force winds are expected or are possible, whereas the Tropical Storm Watch/Warning will be issued for areas on either side of the Hurricane Watch/Warning.

5. Localized Evacuations: Localized Evacuations may be ordered or recommended when an emergency occurs, which affects a relatively small area, such as a Hazardous Materials release or a large fire. Localized Evacuation would also include river or lake flooding caused by strong, sustained easterly winds in low lying areas outside the levee protection system.

B. Methods of Notification

1. Officials and Organizations: The notification of key officials and organizations in the City can be accomplished by several means. Upon notification of an emergency, the Director of the Office of Emergency Preparedness will determine who is to be notified based upon the severity, type, and location of the occurring emergency.

a. Emergency Hotline Telephone System: The "Mayor's Hotline" is a pre-programmed telephone system which connects the EOC.

b. Emergency Preparedness FAX: Situational updates and messages of a non-immediate nature can be transmitted to city/parish agencies, other municipalities, emergency operations centers, and the State EOC.

c. Landline and Mobile Telephone Systems: EOC keeps a comprehensive listing of telephone numbers to be called for varying situations. Key officials and personnel are listed by business phone, home phone, mobile phone, and electronic pager number. The general public will be notified of emergencies by all means possible when it is determined to be necessary by the Director of the Office of Emergency Preparedness. Warning bulletins will be disseminated by the Office of Emergency Preparedness, coordinated with the Office of Communications. Warnings will generally include areas affected and precautions to be taken.

d. Emergency Alert System (EAS): The Emergency Alert System is the primary means of advising the public of a localized emergency. The primary EAS stations for New Orleans are WWL (870 AM) and WLMG (101.9 FM). The EAS can be contacted by telephone and radio.

2. Media: The broadcast media provide a major part of the city's capability to warn the public in a timely manner.

a. A combination of Live Media Statements and Pre-recorded Messages will be used as a disaster situation develops. Once the Emergency Operations Center is activated, the task of updating the media falls to the Office of Communications.

b. Mobile Public Address Systems: New Orleans Police Department personnel can be called upon to use the public address systems built into their vehicles.



The safe evacuation of threatened populations when endangered by a major catastrophic event is one of the principle reasons for developing a Comprehensive Emergency Management Plan. The thorough identification of at-risk populations, transportation and sheltering resources, evacuation routes and potential bottlenecks and choke points, and the establishment of the management team that will coordinate not only the evacuation but which will monitor and direct the sheltering and return of affected populations, are the primary tasks of evacuation planning. Due to the geography of New Orleans and the varying scales of potential disasters and their resulting emergency evacuations, different plans are in place for small-scale evacuations and for citywide relocations of whole populations.

Authority to issue evacuations of elements of the population is vested in the Mayor. By Executive Order, the chief elected official, the Mayor of the City of New Orleans, has the authority to order the evacuation of residents threatened by an approaching hurricane.

Evacuation procedures for special needs persons with either physical or mental handicaps, including registration of disabled persons, is covered in the SOP for Evacuation of Special Needs Persons.

Major population relocations resulting from an approaching hurricane or similar anticipated disaster, caused the City of New Orleans Office of Emergency Preparedness to develop a specific Hurricane Emergency Evacuation Standard Operating Procedures, which are appended to the Comprehensive Emergency Management Plan.

The SOP is developed to provide for an orderly and coordinated evacuation intended to minimize the hazardous effects of flooding, wind, and rain on the residents and visitors in New Orleans. The SOP provides for the evacuation of the public from danger areas and the designations of shelters for evacuees.


The Hurricane Emergency Evacuation Standard Operating Procedure is designed to deal with all case scenarios of an evacuation in response to the approach of a major hurricane towards New Orleans. It is designed to deal with the anticipation of a direct hit from a major hurricane. This includes identifying the city's present population, its projected population, identification of at-risk populations (those living outside levee protection or in storm-surge areas, floodplains, mobile homes, etc.), in order to understand the evacuation requirements. It includes identifying the transportation network, especially the carrying-capacity of proposed evacuation routes and existing or potential traffic bottlenecks or blockages, caused either by traffic congestion or natural occurrences such as rising waters. Identification of sheltering resources and the establishment of shelters and the training of shelter staff is important, as is the provision for food and other necessities to the sheltered. This preparation function is the responsibility of the Office of Emergency Preparedness.

Conduct of an actual evacuation will be the responsibility of the Mayor of New Orleans in coordination with the Director of the Office of Emergency Preparedness, and the OEP Shelter Coordinator.

The SOP, in unison with other elements of the Comprehensive Emergency Management Plan, is designed for use in all hazard situations, including citywide evacuations in response to hurricane situations and addresses three elements of emergency response: warning, evacuation, and sheltering.

1. Warning: Formulates a comprehensive system for public information, early recognition of impending storms, and dissemination of emergency warning.

2. Evacuation: Formulates an effective procedure for orderly evacuation of residents and visitors within available warning time.

3. Sheltering: Formulates a comprehensive system of accessible shelters of adequate size.

The SOP is limited as it is not designed to address the protection of personal and real property, yet is developed to cover the total New Orleans geographic area. The timely issuance of evacuation orders critically impacts upon the successful evacuation of all citizens from high-risk areas. In determining the proper time to issue evacuation orders, there is no substitute for human judgement based upon all known circumstances surrounding local conditions and storm characteristics.

Information received from the National Hurricane Center concerning the storm's tract will allow the focusing on either a landfall, paralleling or exiting storm scenario. Information involving local conditions such as pre-hurricane rainfall, tide schedules, and the amount of pre-storm publicity, must be taken into account, as are the various known circumstances that are explained in the information summary portion of the Hurricane Evacuation Plan, in determining when an evacuation order should be issued. Any assumption regarding where and how the storm will likely make landfall involves clear and constant communication with the National Hurricane Center, the local office of the National Weather Service, State OEP and various local agencies that are monitoring either the storm's progress or other elements of the city's preparedness to weather the storm's passage.

The City of New Orleans will utilize all available resources to quickly and safely evacuate threatened areas. Those evacuated will be directed to temporary sheltering and feeding facilities as needed. When specific routes of progress are required, evacuees will be directed to those routes. Special arrangements will be made to evacuate persons unable to transport themselves or who require specific life saving assistance. Additional personnel will be recruited to assist in evacuation procedures as needed.

Slow developing weather conditions (primarily hurricane) will create increased readiness culminating in an evacuation order 24 hours (12 daylight hours) prior to predicted landfall. Disabled vehicles and debris will be removed from highways so as not to impede evacuation. In local evacuations involving more than fifty (50) families (i.e. 50 single dwelling units), staging areas may be established at the closest available public area outside the threatened area. Upon arrival at the staging area, evacuees will be directed to the appropriate shelter facility. Evacuees will be encouraged to stay with friends or relatives in non-threatened areas whenever possible. Security measures will be employed to protect the evacuated area(s) in accordance with established procedures and situations.

The use of travel-trailers, campers, motorcycles, bicycles, etc., during the evacuation will be allowed so long as the situation permits it. Public information broadcasts will include any prohibitions on their use. Transportation will be provided to those persons requiring public transportation from the area. (See Special Needs Transportation, ESF-1). An orderly return to the evacuated areas will be provided after the Mayor determines the threat to be terminated. Transportation back to the evacuated area after threat termination will be provided as available.


A. Authority

As established by the City of New Orleans Charter, the government has jurisdiction and responsibility in disaster response. City government shall coordinate its efforts through the Office of Emergency Preparedness

The authority to order the evacuation of residents threatened by an approaching hurricane is conferred to the Governor by Louisiana Statute. The Governor is granted the power to direct and compel the evacuation of all or part of the population from a stricken or threatened area within the State, if he deems this action necessary for the preservation of life or other disaster mitigation, response or recovery. The same power to order an evacuation conferred upon the Governor is also delegated to each political subdivision of the State by Executive Order. This authority empowers the chief elected official of New Orleans, the Mayor of New Orleans, to order the evacuation of the parish residents threatened by an approaching hurricane.

B. Issuance of Evacuation Orders

The person responsible for recognition of hurricane related preparation needs and for the issuance of an evacuation order is the Mayor of the City of New Orleans. Concerning preparation needs and the issuance of an evacuation order, The Office of Emergency Preparedness should keep the Mayor advised.


It must be understood that this Comprehensive Emergency Management Plan is an all-hazard response plan, and is applicable to events of all sizes, affecting even the smallest segments of the community. Evacuation procedures for small scale and localized evacuations are conducted per the SOPs of the New Orleans Fire Department and the New Orleans Police Department. However, due to the sheer size and number of persons to be evacuated, should a major tropical weather system or other catastrophic event threaten or impact the area, specifically directed long range planning and coordination of resources and responsibilities efforts must be undertaken.

A. Evacuation Time Requirements

Using information developed as part of the Southeast Louisiana Hurricane Task Force and other research, the City of New Orleans has established a maximum acceptable hurricane evacuation time standard for a Category 3 storm event of 72 hours. This is based on clearance time or is the time required to clear all vehicles evacuating in response to a hurricane situation from area roadways. Clearance time begins when the first evacuating vehicle enters the road network and ends when the last evacuating vehicle reaches its destination.

Clearance time also includes the time required by evacuees to secure their homes and prepare to leave (mobilization time); the time spent by evacuees traveling along the road network (travel time); and the time spent by evacuees waiting along the road network due to traffic congestion (delay time). Clearance time does not refer to the time a single vehicle spends traveling on the road network. Evacuation notices or orders will be issued during three stages prior to gale force winds making landfall.

> Precautionary Evacuation Notice: 72 hours or less

> Special Needs Evacuation Order: 8-12 hours after Precautionary Evacuation Notice issued

> General Evacuation Notice: 48 hours or less

B. Evacuation Zones

Evacuation (vulnerability) zones provide a base to model traffic movements from one geographic area to another. It is necessary to revise the evacuation zones from time to time due to data generated by new generations of storm-surge modeling .

Evacuation zones are designed to meet several functions: (1) In coastal areas they must reflect the areas in each storm scenario which will need to be evacuated due to storm-surge inundation; (2) They should relate as closely as possible to available population data information, such as enumeration districts, census tracts, zip code areas, transportation analysis zones, etc.; and (3) They need to be describable in a manner that persons in the area will be able to understand.

Evacuation zones will be developed pending further study.

C. Evacuation Routing and Traffic Control

New Orleans is surrounded by water. The Lake Pontchartrain Causeway leads to the north, the I-10 twin spans head east, I-10 runs east-west and the Crescent City Connection and the Huey P. Long bridges cross over the Mississippi River. Evacuation presents unique and distinct challenges.

Principle traffic control is provided by the New Orleans Police Department. The movement of evacuating vehicles during a hurricane evacuation requires specific traffic control efforts to insure the maximum roadway capacity and to expedite safe escape from hurricane hazards.

1. Bridge closures will be announced as necessary.

2. NOPD officers will be stationed at critical intersections and roadway segments

3. All available tow trucks shall be positioned along key roadway segments, and disabled vehicles will be removed from traffic lanes. No repairs will be done to vehicles along the evacuation routes.

4. Manual direction of traffic will be supplemented by physical barriers that are adequately weighted and which are placed to channel traffic and prevent unnecessary turning and merging conflicts.

5. The movement of mobile homes and campers along evacuation routes will be banned after a hurricane warning is issued. A disabled mobile home could block the only escape route available. Such vehicles are difficult to handle late in an evacuation due to sporadic wind conditions.

6. Boat owners must be made aware of time requirements for moving or securing vessels. Optimally, industrial and recreational vessels should be moved to safe harbor during or before a hurricane watch.

7. Emergency Response to Accidents/Breakdowns - The intensity of traffic during a hurricane evacuation will always be accompanied by a certain number of traffic accidents and breakdowns. Although roadway shoulders are available for vehicles in distress, the movement of such vehicles to these areas is often difficult and disruptive. It is recommended that at least two traffic control personnel be positioned at each key roadway link/intersection so that one can assist disabled vehicles as needed. Two vehicles should also be positioned at each critical link to facilitate the removal of immobilized vehicles, however, as resources (two vehicles) are available.

8. Safe evacuation is predicated upon the movement of vehicles over critically low points on evacuation routes prior to the occurrence of flooding. Route blockages can happen prior to the arrival of a hurricane. Those roadways that historically experience flooding due to rainfall alone should be monitored for vehicle distress and help.

D. Evacuation Clearance Times

Clearance time is the time required to clear the roadways of all vehicles evacuating in response to a hurricane situation. Clearance time begins when the first evacuating vehicle (as defined by a hurricane evacuation behavioral response curve) enters the road network and ends when the last evacuating vehicle reaches an assumed point of safety. Clearance time includes the time required by evacuees to secure their homes and prepare to leave (referred to as mobilization time). Clearance time DOES NOT RELATE to the time any one vehicle spends traveling on the road network. Clearance time allows for the last vehicle leaving to reach its destination or the parish line, whichever comes first.

Assumptions - Clearance time is based on a set of assumed conditions and behavioral responses. It is likely that an actual storm will differ from a simulated storm for which clearance times are calculated in this report. Key assumptions guiding the analysis are grouped into five areas: 1. Population Data

2. Storm Scenarios

3. Behavioral Characteristic of the Evacuating Population

4. Roadway Network and Traffic Control Assumptions

5. Evacuation Zones

The clearance times facing Orleans Parish for a severe hurricane will necessitate proper traffic control and early evacuating decision making. The evacuation must be completed before the arrival of gale force winds. Evacuation should also start when school is not in session and when there is at least eight (8) hours of daylight included in the evacuation time allowed. Provisions must be made for the removal of disabled vehicles. Flooding of roadways due to rainfall before a hurricane arrives could close off critical evacuation routes rendering evacuation impossible.


A. Mayor

* Initiate the evacuation.

* Retain overall control of all evacuation procedures via EOC operations.

* Authorize return to evacuated areas.

B. Office of Emergency Preparedness

* Activate EOC and notify all support agencies to this plan.

* Coordinate with State OEP on elements of evacuation.

* Assist in directing the transportation of evacuees to staging areas.

* Assist ESF-8, Health and Medical, in the evacuation of persons with special needs, nursing home, and hospital patients in accordance with established procedures.

* Coordinate the release of all public information through ESF-14, Public Information.

* Use EAS, television, cable and other public broadcast means as needed and in accordance with established procedure.

* Request additional law enforcement/traffic control (State Police, La. National Guard) from State OEP.

C. New Orleans Police Department

* Ensure orderly traffic flow.

* Assist in removing disabled vehicles from roadways as needed.

* Direct the management of transportation of seriously injured persons to hospitals as needed.

* Direct evacuees to proper shelters and/or staging areas once they have departed the threatened area.

* Release all public information through the ESF-14, Public Information.

D. Regional Transit Authority

* Supply transportation as needed in accordance with the current Standard Operating Procedures.

* Place special vehicles on alert to be utilized if needed.

* Position supervisors and dispatch evacuation buses.

* If warranted by scope of evacuation, implement additional service.

E. Louisiana National Guard

* Provide assistance as needed in accordance with current State guidelines.

F. Animal Care and Control

* Coordinate animal rescue operations with the New Orleans SPCA.

G. Public Works

* Make emergency road repairs as needed.

H. Office of Communications

* Release all public information relating to the evacuation.


(See ESF-6, Mass Care)

Emergency shelter operations are the responsibility of the Office of Emergency Preparedness Shelter Coordinator. Shelters are provided by the Orleans Parish School Board, while manager training and support activities and supplies are provided by the Office of Emergency Preparedness.

Reassessment of facilities is an on-going process conducted jointly by the School Board, and Emergency Preparedness Division. The shelter activation list is updated yearly, and takes into consideration new school construction, school closings and renovations.

A. Shelter Demand

Shelter demand is currently under review by the Shelter Coordinator. Approximately 100,000 Citizens of New Orleans do not have means of personal transportation. Shelter assessment is an ongoing project of the Office of Emergency Preparedness through the Shelter Coordinator.

The following schools have been inspected and approved as Hurricane Evacuation Shelters for the City of New Orleans: Laurel Elementary School

Walter S. Cohen High School

Medard Nelson Elementary School

Sarah T. Reed High School

Southern University Multi Purpose Center

Southern University New Science Building

O. Perry Walker High School

Albert Wicker Elementary School

It should not be assumed that all of the approved shelters listed above will be opened in the event of a hurricane or other major tropical storm. The names and locations of open shelters will be announced when an evacuation order is issued. This list is not for public information and should not be duplicated and distributed. In the event that shelters are opened, people who go to their nearest listed location may find, for one reason or another, that the facility is not open as a shelter, forcing them to seek an alternate location. It is also possible that people anticipating the opening of shelters may arrive before shelters are set-up and ready to receive them. For these and other reasons, shelters which are to be used will not be identified until they are ready to open and not until an evacuation order, related public announcement is made.

Last Resort Refuges and Super Shelters are described in specific SOPs covering their applications.



City of New Orleans Comprehensive Emergency Management Plan


Following a disaster, once the principal threat has passed and the primary concern of protection of citizens from harm has been addressed, it becomes critical to public safety to ensure the speedy yet orderly recovery of the community. Recovery functions include continued, potentially long?term response operations (such as debris removal and disposal, infrastructure repair, etc.), liaison with State and Federal response and recovery agencies, damage assessment, response to basic needs of citizens whom may have lost their homes, possessions, businesses, or jobs. Emergency management has to be prepared to address the long?term operations needed to return the community to normalcy.


The lead agency responsible for coordinating recovery operations following a natural or man made disaster is the Office of Emergency Preparedness. The Director of the Office of Emergency Preparedness shall serve as the initial contact with the Louisiana Office of Emergency Preparedness for the coordination of recovery efforts. In the event of a major or catastrophic event, the activated ESFs within the EOC shall provide liaison services to their corresponding State and Federal ESFs and related agencies. Following the establishment of a local Disaster Field Office (DFO), the Director of Emergency Preparedness shall designate the person(s) to serve as local liaison with the DFO. For certain hazard or incident specific incidents, the lead response agency may continue to be the City's principle coordinating representative.

Once into the recovery phase of a major disaster, ESF?5, Planning and Information, shall assume the liaison function with the State recovery staff, as will appropriate representatives of the various activated City agencies involved in recovery operations. Coordination for the establishment of Disaster Relief Centers, additional staging areas, and other sites that may be needed for coordinated assistance will primarily be the responsibility of ESF?7, Resource Support, and its support agency.

A. Damage Assessment

The Director of the Office of Emergency Preparedness shall designate a Damage Assessment Officer to supervise assigned persons in a Damage Assessment Unit (DAU). This unit will have three functional components:

1. Public Sector Damage Assessment Team(s), which will be responsible for assessing the damage inflicted upon publicly?owned property.

2. Private Sector Damage Assessment Team(s), which will be responsible for collecting information on housing and business losses.

3. Human Needs Assessment Team(s), are persons assigned to collect field information on the needs of the community following a disaster that has severely impacted facilities and other community assets that are depended upon for daily living, and to report back to the EOC.

Specific damage assessment procedures and responsibilities can be found in Standard Operating Procedure for Damage Assessment. Impact to the local economy shall be ascertained however possible, but will rely on the following organizations for preliminary information and periodically revised data:

1. Property Appraiser's Office (value of damaged or destroyed properties)

2. City Planning Commission (impact on jobs, etc.)

3. ESF?18, Business and Industry (business specific losses)

Information gathered shall be monitored for inclusion in Situation Reports by ESF?5, Information and Planning. Initial damage assessments shall be accomplished by participation in flyovers conducted by the Louisiana National Guard. City representatives will participate in the flyover. Flyovers will also be used to initially develop a needs assessment for goods and services needed by the community as a result of the disaster. Needs assessment data and information will be tracked by ESF?5, Information and Planning, and distributed to human service response agencies. Other methods used to assess physical damages and develop needs and services estimates include:

1. Additional flyovers.

2. City vehicles, such as trucks, automobiles, off?road vehicles, etc.

3. Riverside damage assessment shall be conducted by the Harbor Police.

4. Where damage is extensive, and roads may not be passable, damage assessment teams may resort to foot patrols.

B. Human Services

Location of Disaster Relief Centers and other recovery operation sites shall be the joint responsibility of ESF?7, Resource Support, and the Damage Assessment Teams, which will scout undamaged or lightly damaged facilities while conducting field surveys. Prior to hurricane season, a list of potential buildings should be compiled that meet the criteria for a Disaster Relief Center or other recovery function. These facilities shall then be checked by damage assessment teams for potential use following a disaster. An inventory of city owned properties will also be available in the EOC and certain facilities, such as large community centers, shall be reviewed for use at the time.

Multiple sites shall be identified and geographically positioned to serve the impacted populations without placing burdens upon those who may have lost their private transportation resources as a result of the disaster. Regional Transit Authority may be called upon to provide free transit to recovery centers located along existing bus routes. Recovery center staffing patterns shall be developed along accepted state and federal guidelines and provided from city, state and private agencies.

Feeding and food and supply distribution sites shall be established following a disaster in geographically distributed sites across the Parish. Feeding sites shall be established by ESF?6, Mass Care, in conjunction with ESF?11, Food and Water. The Southeast Louisiana Chapter of the American Red Cross and the Salvation Army shall provide the lead in establishing and operating these sites. The Second Harvest Food Bank shall provide leadership in the acquiring and distribution of food and water. ESF?15, Volunteers and Donations, shall direct outside resources to the appropriate sites where these volunteer services can best be used. Temporary living areas shall be established when possible on city owned property. ESF?7, Resource Support, shall assist in the location and acquisition of non city owned property. The New Orleans Housing Authority shall be called upon to assist with public housing for the temporarily displaced.

C. Infrastructure

Following a disaster of such magnitude that far exceeds the City's and State's ability to meet the needs of the community and results in the requesting and granting of a Presidential Disaster Declaration, the Office of Emergency Preparedness shall, as previously described, at the request of the Federal Emergency Management Agency or Louisiana Office of Emergency Preparedness, establish Disaster Relief Centers for individuals seeking recovery assistance. These sites shall be established at geographically strategic sites, providing all affected citizens with access to available programs, and shall provide representatives from numerous federal, state, local, and private relief agencies. Locations of the centers, as well as information on FEMA's teleregistration program, shall be made known via ESF?14, Public Information, and all other available information outlets (see ESF?14, Public Information).

For affected governments and qualified not?for?profit organizations, a Public Officials Briefing shall be held. At the briefing, public officials shall be oriented on available assistance and procedures, and shall receive "Notice Of Interest" forms to be filed with state and federal officials. Subsequent "Project Applications" shall be filed with FEMA for further processing. State and federal authorities will evaluate the project applications and determine justification for assistance.

City of New Orleans Department personnel shall serve as the City's principal representatives in preparation of disaster application forms, monitoring of projects to completion and certification, and disbursement of relief funds. The City shall also coordinate the development of Disaster Survey Reports and review and represent the City in negotiations for restitution of losses with federal and state officials.

Debris removal shall be coordinated and executed by ESF?3, Public Works and Engineering. Fallen trees and similar debris shall be disposed of to the extent possible. Methods for disposal of non?mulchable debris shall be determined by ESF?3, in conjunction with local and state environmental officials. Administrative procedures for financial transactions, cost accounting, grants management, document tracking and payroll processing will be implemented by ESF?7, Resource Support. Following deactivation of the EOC, these functions shall be continued by those agencies that staff ESF?7. Procedures and instructions for preparing Disaster Survey Reports and tracking disaster costs have been developed by the City. The City also provides training and instruction on these procedures.



City of New Orleans Comprehensive Emergency Management Plan


Mitigation includes those activities, policies or programs developed and adopted by government officials which will reduce, eliminate, or alleviate damage caused by disasters. Proper and coordinated planning is a prerequisite to effective and efficient procedural changes required in addressing hazard mitigation. The City of New Orleans currently participates in, or has commenced the initial stages of several programs intended to reduce the risk to lives and to minimize damage to public and private properties.


Mitigation programs include coordinated city, state and federal efforts that are currently in place, such as the National Flood Insurance Program, or future actions designed to reduce the loss of life and extensive property damage.

A. National Flood Insurance Program (NFIP)

The City of New Orleans is a participant in the National Flood Insurance Program (NFIP). The City's participation is conducted by the City Planning Commission (CPC). Citizens may receive information as to the NFIP rating of their properties at the City Hall (CPC) office. As much of the development now in place in New Orleans was developed prior to adoption of NFIP standards and rating zones, it is anticipated that should a major hurricane strike our area, that many structures, both private and public, would have to be rebuilt or replaced by structures meeting NFIP standards.

B. Future Plans

Future mitigation plans include:

1. Drainage network management.

2. Protection of wetlands and marshes.

3. Floodplain management.

4. Preservation of the levee system.

5. Providing hurricane shelter.

6. Restricting imprudent development.

7. Mitigation actions following natural disasters and post?disaster plan development.

In response to a major destructive storm, future plans call for the preparation of a post disaster plan that will identify programs and actions that will reduce or eliminate the exposure of human life and property to natural hazards. To direct the City's hurricane recovery operations, the Mayor will appoint a Recovery Task Force (RTF). The RTF shall include the Chief Administrative Officer, the Director of the Emergency Preparedness, Public Works Director, Public Utilities Director, Director of Safety and Permits and any others as directed by the Mayor. Staff shall be provided by those appointed, as well as by those elements of the OEP responsible for recovery operations. The RTF shall provide the following tasks:

1. Review and decide upon emergency building permits.

2. Analyze and recommend hazard mitigation options, including reconstruction or relocation of damaged public facilities.

3. Coordinate the preparation of the post?disaster redevelopment plan.

4. Recommend amendments to the Comprehensive Emergency Management Plan, and other appropriate policies and procedures.

5. Coordinate with state and federal officials disaster assistance.

In order to ensure broad?based local participation in guiding long?term redevelopment, the following recommendations are submitted:

1. That the RTF be tasked with overseeing long?term disaster recovery and mitigation efforts, once the life threatening aspects of a major disaster has passed, as an adjunct operation of the OEP.

3. That the RTF shall develop periodic reports on recovery efforts and operations for submission to the Mayor and City Council.

4. That the RTF focus on such issues as Building Code modifications, zoning and land use management, building code compliance and enforcement, retrofitting public facilities, local legislation designed to reduce the risk of life and property in areas vulnerable to the impacts of predictable, recurring hazards.