Traffic Tips

I'm a geek, I admit it, and I study my site stats. I don't know much more than the fact that a Hugh Hewitt will do more for your site's traffic than coming up with the meaning of life. But if you are desperate to bring in the web search traffic, here are two ideas, although I don't completely endorse them.

1. Misspell newsworthy words. The Bekaa Valley, for instance. I spelled it wrong (Bekka) on accident, and I became the number three search on Google for those mentally incapcitated such as myself. Many people are poor spellers. Get a good misspell on Google, and you have instant traffic.

2. Randomly name a hard core or soft core porn star. I was feisty one night a few weeks ago, and I wrote a blue humorous piece. I named a soft core porn star in the piece, and since then I've been getting hits from people searching for her. Here's the catch on that one: They probably don't care to read what you have to say; they visited hoping to find nudie pictures. This one will bring traffic, but probably not traffic you really are looking for.

Now, sit back, enjoy a drink or 7, and wait for election tallies to come in.